Written by Steddyeddy
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Saturday, 17 May 2008

image for Disabled trainee fireman sues Health and Safety Executive
Fireman Sam is in there somewhere

A disabled trainee fireman, who has been training at a fire station for the past 6 years, is suing the Health and Safety Executive because they are banning him from qualifying as a fireman.

Trainee Fireman Sam, from Liverpool, is livid that after all the years of training, the HSE won't allow him to pass out at next month's ceremony for new recruits. He takes up the story.

"I can appreciate that I have been in a wheelchair since I was a teenager, but the lads at Toxteth have been great. When doing fire rescue training, one of the team has no hesitation in whipping me out of my wheelchair, throwing me over their shoulder, and with the hose in my mouth, shimmying up the ladder. Then someone on the ground throws my wheelchair up. We have even found it is a great tool for breaking windows.

"I think this is quite discriminatory, and I would report it to the Equality and Human Right Commission, you know, the one that used to be the Commission for Equality and Human Rights until the local Prontaprint complained they weren't getting enough letterhead business from the Government. But I feel I wont get anywhere with them.

"My friend Eric, who is deaf, is taking the London Symphony Orchestra to court because they sacked him as their piano tuner after only 1 hour in the job. I mean, he only said "pardon" a few times, and I do appreciate that when they asked him if he was married, he replied "a quarter past three". But that's no reason to sack him.

"This is just not fair."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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