Written by Terence Cloth
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Friday, 18 April 2008

image for New Strategy to deal with unruly pupils

Today, it is being reported, psychologists recommend that when teachers deal with unruly pupils in class they should ignore the bad behaviour and praise good behaviour.

Dr Y. Bebothered "Yes, it is true that positive reinforcement of good behaviour will have a beneficial effect."

"But if the child is ignored they may cause more trouble to get more attention." A concerned parent.
My mate Jez, down the pub, has come up with a slightly unorthodox but effective strategy.

"Well, what you should do is arm the little shits with darts. Then when one of 'em plays up the teacher commands the rest of the pupils to down tools and launch the darts at the annoying git.

"When that first dart breaks his flesh, and he knows there are another 29 heading his way. Watch the little bugger calm down then."

Jez, who has no experience in child care, put this to an eminent psychologist. The psychologist, who turned pale before passing out, refused to comment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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