Written by Kent Pete
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Topics: Sex, Robots

Tuesday, 15 April 2008

image for Sex With Robots? A View Of The Future
All action Dolly.... [Batteries not included]

People will be having sex with robots by 2050, an artificial intelligence expert has predicted.

David Lomas's book, 'Love And Sex With Robots: The Evolution Of Human-Robot Relationships', claims robots will become so lifelike that they will be hard to distinguish from real people.

The 62-year-old retired Wet Nurse from Porlock in Somerset, writes , "Great sex for everyone, 24/7. What's not to like? Bring it on I say "

Robot technology is advancing hugely across the world, with Japan in particular making great strides towards robots which can help out in homes or hospitals.

Robots are now becoming so life like that they are beginning to mimic real human behaviours. Our Science correspondent Peter Musgrove decided to 'test drive' one of Lomas's prototype models, known simply as AR59.

Meeting in 'The Peking Diner', Bromley, the evening started well. Calling herself 'Dolly', the female robot was attentive, some would say even flirtatious. She displayed a great interest in anything our correspondent said, even going as far as congratulating him on his choice of tie.

Dolly watched as our reporter finished off three plates of Fried Chicken in Black Bean Sauce, a 'Harriot Duck' and a generous helping of Pie and Cream. Never once grimacing at the amount he consumed , our reporter believed she compared favourably to his recent human dates.

However the problems started when he tried to escort the 'Fembot' home. When Musgrove suggested that he, 'come in for coffee', Dolly became hesitant, saying that she had to be up early in the morning and that she would like to run Windows Washer before she went to bed. Attempting to force his way in, Dolly simply reminded our reporter that all she need do is press her F9 button and all entry would be impossible.

Not entirely sure about how he would stand legally if he were to 'reboot' Dolly, our correspondent decided not to pursue the matter any further.

Mr Lomas admits that his robot needs some refining.

"It is true, there are times when AR59's behaviour does not resemble that of a human. The part of the computer programme controlling social skills will need to be revamped before she goes on general sale. I took her to one of London's top restaurants last weekend and when the waiter asked her whether she preferred the Beetroot-cured Salmon or the Sautéed Fois Gras , "Dolly" replied that she didn't have any knickers on. The Ivy hadn't witnessed behaviour like that since Princess Michael of Kent left town."

However Lomas maintains that the people most likely to use a robot for sex are those that are too ugly or too isolated to find human romance. It would seem our reporter may well qualify on both counts.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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