The British Prime Minister, Gorgon Brown today made a public declaration of his disdain at Robert Mugababy President, dictator and overlord of Zimbabwe.
The Labour leader appeared on the BBC (Brown's Broadcasting Corporation) and announced that he would cease to be Prime Monster until Mugababy had been arrested and charged with the many thousands of human rights abuses.
He was reported to have said:"Mugababy has caused a once prosperous country to fall into such decline were inflation has risen to almost 8,000%, unemployment is 80% and life expectancy has been considerably lowered. It is party policy to do nothing; my predecessor, Tony Bliar, did nothing, and that is all I can do too. I have already boycotted the Lisbon Summit because one monster is enough- what do they want with two? I am going to hang the Keys to no.10 in the lobby of the House of Commons and live in a cardboard box until he faces trial"
"Even when I was Chancellor of the Exchequer, I tried to emulate Mugababy's principles, but, try as I might, I have not been able to achieve them to the same degree in my own country and frankly I'm a wee bit jealous." He added.
The 81 year-old Mugababy, already three times as old as most of the citizens of his country was reputed to be as equally as angry at the Old British colonial system and accuses the whites of stealing valuable land for their farms. Now I've done to them, what they did to us - I stole it back and give it to some blacks to manage. The blacks have made such a mess that our country is now ruined! Ruined! It would not have been ruined if they hadn't colonised our land in the first place. Now, there are so few people left alive who can remember when it was called Rhodesia that they think the hard-working black farmers are clearing the mess left by the whites. A cunning plan really."
Conservative leader, David Cameron was delighted and said "I would have done the same thing - in fact it was our idea and someone must have leaked the news to him."