Written by Adam Barefaced-Lie
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Topics: BBC, Radio

Wednesday, 31 October 2007

image for BBC DJ To Have Both Feet Amputated
"And now on Radio 2..."

Radio 2 early morning DJ is to have both feet amputated following serious gunshot wounds that the Director of the British Orthopaedic Foot & Ankle Society described as the "worst injury" he had ever seen.

It is thought that the injuries were sustained live on air during her radio show last week whilst she was commenting on how, whilst driving to work that morning, she avoided a black pedestrian.

She said on air "It's lucky he opened his mouth to yawn or do something and I saw him. He was wearing a black clothes and a black hat, he was just invisible," .

A BBC source said "She is very lucky to be alive having appeared to have repeatedly shot herself in the foot".

Rules concerning loose cannons are thought to be under review at BBC Radio 2 as apparently this is not the first incident of it's kind. Fortunately her injuries in the past have been minor, but have significantly contributed to her present condition.

All incidents have occurred whilst Sarah has been speaking. The first occurred when she accused a newsreader of "soiling her pants", and subsequent incidents have been accompanied by her calling a clergyman an "old prune", and slurring her speech during her entire broadcast.

Black civil Rights Campaigner and close personal friend said "Thank F**K the silly bitch didn't say anything offensive or racist and has a long track record of diplomacy and tact to fall back on."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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