Written by Mister Meaner
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Topics: Sex, Old People

Wednesday, 31 October 2007

image for Over 60s Now More Sexually Active Than Ever
Singing and shagging, it's all they do!

People in the over 60s age group are now more sexually active than their younger counterparts, according to a bloke in the pub.

More than 95% of those interviewed by the man confessed to having had an extramarital affair whilst they had been drawing their pensions, whilst nearly a third claimed to have taken part in a 'threesome'.

One woman, Ethel Floozy, of the Frozen North, said:

"I'm 78, but that doesn't stop me. I'm at it like a rabbit every night!"

Another, Gracie Arbuckle, 83, from Manchester, choked by cigarette smoke, said:

"I get all randy about six o'clock after me tea. I mention to me husband about making sure he 'doesn't leave the backdoor unlocked', and that's all he needs. That's unless it's a Sunday. We usually wait until after Songs of Praise."

Analysts claim that sex amongst the old and crippled can be a good thing, and can even prolong life.

Dr David Brufen of the Old Age Sex Institute near Birmingham, said:

"There's nothing wrong with it as long as grandad is careful once grandma hits the high notes."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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