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Friday, 28 September 2007

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Nostradamus thought the Diana Inquest spells disaster for the Hellfire Club

Royal Courts of Justice, Strand - (Diabolical Mess): A guaranteed bloodbath: that was Nostradamus' prediction about next Tuesday's inquest into the death of the Hellfire Club's Princess Diana, ten years after a drunk driver turned her into hystery.

Newly translated quatrains from the seer's first edition say that when the dramatis personae of the torrid affair are all gathered under one roof 'the angel of retribution shall come upon them and smite the silly grins off their po-faced visages in an oblique reference to a possible military coup d'etat.

The new interpretations of the mystic verses are also unequivocal that 'the death of the she-serpent, the Lilith of old' will start the chain of events that 'destroy the heathen harlot's viper's nest' - a reference many believe could apply to Margaret Thatcher.

Metropolitan Police Diplomatic Protection Squad officers are by no means a superstitious bunch.

But having assigned five armed cops to each juror for the next three months they are clearly taking no chances from next Tuesday.

"Of course it's also handy having them there in court given the ranks of rubbish litigants like Mohammed Fayed and Paul Burrel sitting in the Gallery," a New Scotland yard source said today.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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