Written by Mark Lowton
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Tuesday, 14 August 2007

image for Disruption at Heathrow Protests
This hapless chap had to leave his lunch and make a quick getaway

It seems the bad weather which dogged the UK in July is continuing as torrential rain hits east London.

With nearly 1,500 protesters camping just north of Heathrow airport, many had feared their protest would cause significant disruption to holiday makers during their busy period. In an unexpected twist however, it seems it is the protesters themselves who will be facing the most disruption.

A record 60mm of rain fell in just twenty minutes. Traffic controllers were unable to take immediate action and flight EZ123, which had already begun its descent on Heathrow, continued to make its landing.

Upon touchdown, the aircraft failed to slow and began skidding across the asphalt. The plane soon left the end of the runway, taking a direct course towards the protest camp.

Luckily all protesters managed to scramble out of their tents, discarding half-smoked cannabis joints, mood rings, and love beads as they hastily made their way to safety.

The aircraft finally came to rest having decimated the entire protest site. No passengers were harmed and many gave up great whoops and cheers as they disembarked the aircraft, knowing they had thwarted the terrorists illegal and immoral attempts to disrupt one of the world's busiest airports.

In tatters, the drenched hippies have reluctantly ended their protest. The individuals are now returning to their homes.

The protest had gathered both national and international interest. Those who took part will be taking their return flights early to destinations including Glasgow, Manchester, New York, and Syndey.

The more local participants climbed into their gas-guzzling and poorly maintained (but nicely decorated) VW camper vans and drove off in a plume of black smoke.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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