Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Kate Middleton

Tuesday, 24 July 2007

image for Kate Middleton in training with women's orgy club
Kate 'recalibrating inner muscles to tone her fabled inner abilities'

London - (Ass Mess): A top women's orgy club, the Swilling Britons, has attracted Kate Middleton to its ranks and has started her on its gruelling six week training course.

Billed on its website as an all-womnen's athletics team the club is sponsored by Chanel and raises charitable funds for former royal tarts who have fallen on hard times.

"We train up women of all ages to compete in the gruelling cut-throat world of man-hunting.

"By learning how to recalibrate their inner muscles our gals soon become superb athletes with hidden abilities to hold on to their man - or men!

"Not one of our alumnae has ever looked back after completing our course, learning our fabled oriental 'boa constrictor' grip and perfecting the oral man-trap technique first developed by Lucrezia Borgia."

Middleton is said to be working out 14 hours a day and has told chums she is looking forward to her black-belt graduation ceremony just in time to launch the second stage of her faltering career as a wannabe princess.

Chelsy Davy is 21.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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