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Sunday, 7 January 2007

image for Royal Navy Cock-A-Hoop As Magic Stunt Goes Wrong
"Abrakadabra...oh shit!" David Blaine

Street magician, David Blaine, is the toast of the Royal Navy today but because his latest illusion went spectacularly wrong in Portsmouth Naval Dockyard.

The weird guy had set up a stunt involving making a small minesweeper disappear and a crowd had gathered to see the show. Breakfast TV host Eamonn Holmes introduced the spooky fella and immediately Blaine had the crowd spellbound with a series of tricks and stunts that seemed to be impossible.

He then got in position for the climax of his act as stagehands suspended him 300 feet above the HMS Shazzam. A quick bit of hocus-pocus, the lights went down and when they came back up the Shazzam hadn't disappeared at all! But much to the amazement of all there; sitting beside her on the dock was another ship identical in every detail.

Captain Birdseye of the Royal navy told us:

"Shiver me timbers me hearties oh arr oh arr! But ain't this a stroke of mighty good luck. These here ships cost 80 million pounds each and to get one for free is just fantastic, oh arr oh arr!"

Prime Minister Tony Blair on hearing the news said:

"This is what the nation can expect under New Labour and it's thanks largely to Gordon Brown's tight fiscal policy that we are in a position to deliver in this way"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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