Written by Ernest Hendrix
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Monday, 18 March 2013

image for Ireland May Leave Eurozone To Join Boyzone
Lenduz O'Tenna

As the eurozone debt crisis deepens by the day, speculation continues to mount that Ireland, with its spiralling debt mountain, will default on its creditors and will ultimately leave the eurozone and instead become the fifth member of Boyzone.

The Minister for Finance, Lenduz O'Tenna, fuelled speculation after he was spotted partying hard with Boyzone members Ronan Keating and the one nobody knows in Dublin bar The Brazen Head on St Patricks day last night. Rumours also abound that the Irish Central bank has started printing Boyzone punts should a eurozone exit occur.

Analysts fear that while the idea of leaving the euro and forming an alliance with Boyzone has appeal, the negatives outweigh the positives.

Ireland's debt, approaching 122 percent of gross domestic product, is the fourth highest in the eurozone. A eurozone exit would initially cause interest rates to rise sharply to attract funds into Ireland. In addition household existing debt would be converted into devalued Boyzone punts leaving them owing more in euro terms.

However presenter and music historian Paul Gambaccini told us: "Ireland and Boyzone have a special fraternity between them and have a lot to gain in forming an economic alliance. With a population of approximately 5 million the alliance can dispatch a million touring Boyzone bands with five members each around the world. The revenue stream from this alone would be enough to solve all of Ireland's financial problems."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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