Written by Joe Leff
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Tuesday, 16 October 2012

A speed trap captured a hearse doing a very nippy 107 mph along a dual carriageway near Slough. Traffic wardens had spotted it earlier doing 50mph along a street with 'Dead Slow' signs.

When stopped and questioned by police officers, the driver of the hearse said that "the coffin had slipped out the back whilst we were driving on the other carriageway. We never noticed till we got to the cemetery."

They were caught speeding on their way back to retrieve the coffin.

Several motorists were visibly shaken after being overtaken by a speeding hearse.

Police officers said there was a 3-mile tail-back on the other dual carriageway.
"But it's like this every morning," complained one stationary driver.

An RAC officer was trying to get the stranded coffin re-started. "I just keep on hearing these funny knocking sounds from under the bonnet," he said. "I'm not all that familiar with these old box cars."

The coffin was later recovered by the funeral directors who drove at high speed with a police convoy to try to get to the cemetery before it closed.

Several motorists were visibly shaken after being overtaken by another speeding hearse.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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