"They're not saying anything but they're out there, all right" Q.V. Welp, MP, noted backbencher and stuffed shirt said Thursday week last, just before the eclipse which was rescheduled at the last moment allowing wireless spacecraft TG862G42 to transit Uranus without losing coverage of the test match at Gribble-on-Avon, Squelch!
"They may be collecting intelligence about all of us, but what good does it do them? They have not advanced any proposals, schemes, interesting tidbits of what ever it is they consider life, God knows what their thinking is on our silly predicament! Don't they have any problems of their own to deal with? Unless they offer to parley soon, or at the very least patronize our advertisers, the Crown may be forced to take interest in other matters - like this offer from Mars for example " (AHH, the life of a backbencher.)
Unfortunately for Welp and his vast constabulary of cameras connected to Facebook, the damage may already be done - the Martian ambassador was mistaken for "just a drunken Welshman on holiday" according to the last sober source at Scotland Yard, "and will spend the next 30 days as a guest of the Blackpool Jail"
If another war breaks out, would anyone notice?


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