Written by Talking Tic-Tacs
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Monday, 10 September 2012

image for Coldplay Incite Mock Hatred
Coldplay Rage, and not antipathy towards superficial pop culture

As Coldplay performed at last nights Paralympic closing ceremony, opportunists seized on the fashionable trend of absolutely hating them, man.

Fabricated musical snobbery was in full flow as pretend muso's bemoaned Coldplay's supposed lack of musical ability, which largely equates as lack of 'cool' capital.

The band's soundtrack to the ceremony was fitting, uplifting and actually spot on with sentiment and tone.

However their sheer hard neck in becoming a global band, their frontman's unforgivable audacity in championing free trade, and the cheek of making indie pop which they've never claimed as being super original, is apparently too much to take for some.

An HMV spokesperson commented, "Its something we increasingly see. An urge to hate something musically in the general absence of manufactured guff."

"For a lot of people its a vehicle for saying something about themselves, namely "im cool as fuck coz i copy some musicians' genuine hatred of the pop culture landscape which allows Coldplay to be so big, but misunderstand that as idly hating Coldplay, man."

Some musician summed it up when asked how they felt about Coldplay, by shrugging his shoulders, saying "they're not bad and they're not great."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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