Written by Joe Leff
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Topics: Restaurants, waiting

Monday, 23 July 2012

A waiter at the QuickStop restaurant on the M1 motorway has been dismissed for being too slow - after only two weeks on duty.

Senior managers had observed Bernard Rushnott "hanging about in the kitchen area". Mr. Rushnott claimed he was "waiting for the kettle to boil".

On another occasion he was seen "hovering too long with dishes near a couple at a table 3.
"I didn't want to interrupt their conversation", said Mr. Rushnott. " I was waiting for the right moment".

The managers were fed up with his excuses. " When he first started here, we were re-organizing the reception area, and we asked him to go to B&Q for a long stand. It was after midnight when he got back - empty handed".

Mr. Rushnott is planning to appeal against his dismissal. " I've been waiting for ages to get a job as a waiter. I practised for hours on end nearly every day. I even used to hang around watching the adverts in shop windows."

Being a lifelong hypochondriac, Mr. Rushnott has spent most of his spare time in doctors' waiting rooms, but he is determined to get his job back. "Just you wait and see!" he said.

Let's hope we don't have to wait too long.
"It's no use waiting," said another disgruntled waiter.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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