Written by j.w.
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Tuesday, 24 April 2012

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New West Ham Fan

West Ham are praying that the Saints will lose their last match and that the Hammers will get 6 past Hull on Saturday, just like in the last home match, just in case the Saints draw their last match. If the prayers are answered the Irons will get automatic promotion to the Premier League.

Sam Allardyce, West Ham manager (until the end of the season and maybe if West Ham don't get promoted) told the Spoof in an exclusive chat at the touchline in Leicester during their last match that he had 'everything under control'. However this emerged to mean he was not going to get off his arse as suggested.

West Ham fans have been visiting their doctors for nervous ailments and have been told to visit their local Churches so they can pray for the Saints to crumble in the first half before they are sent to coventry on Saturday.

Most West Ham fans are not used to praying but, it is thought, Southampton could falter at the last hurdle if a number of Saints get carried away by pretty bubbles.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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