Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 28 February 2012

image for Rebekah's gift horse from Scotland Yard 'was a Trojan'
Only Fools & Whorses: Rebekah Brooks riding her jobbing steed Cool Sun

London - Officers from the Met's Mounted Branch played an absolute blinder it was revealed today as details emerged of a gift whorse (sic) loaned to Rebekah Brooks back in 2008.

A twelve year old nag - nicknamed 'Elveden' after a Met probe into dodgy payments to police by phone hacking suspects - was sent to be fostered by Ms Brooks at her Suny Bay Funny Farm home, named after husband Charlie Brook's 1998 Grand National runner-up.

Two years later the nag was put out to grass with an experienced police officer familiar with rehoming of the Met's specialist Trojan steeds.

The beast was then debriefed with some legendary Met whorse whispering skills and the oral evidence translated into cop-speak English.

Today a number of UK red tops repeated the claim that Brooks 'was a horse riding companion of Prime Monster David Cameron' whose Whitney constituency home in the Cotswolds is stones throw from Chateau Brooks.

This afternoon a spokesperson for No 10 denied rumors that 'the dumb animal had some sort of police bug up its arse'.

Pictures showing Brooks 'in fine fettle on a trusty steed called Cool Sun' (sick) were dismissed as total bollox.

So now we know.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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