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Friday, 24 February 2012

image for Traces of Plutonium 210-style nerve agent on Eric Joyce bar bill?
MPs were all smashed on Thatcher's Old Peculiar

London - Charged with three c*unts of common assault tonight the evidence is piling up high against Falkirk MP Eric Joyce.

Police sources said this evening they were looking into Wednesday night's Strangers Bar CCTV footage where a Commons barman asks MP Eric Joyce "What's yer poison, mate?"

"On its own it's not really much to go by," detectives in charge of the drunk and disorderly case admitted, "until you get a whiff of what the daft sod was probably drinking."

Earlier reports on this website have indicated the Labour MP was downing pints of Thatcher's Old Peculiar - an anti-psychotic tincture normally dispensed in thimblefuls ahead of major dental surgery.

Tonight the police case moved fast amid new and frankly somewhat outlandish twists speculating that a lethal 'Plutonium 210-style' cocktail may have sent the deranged MP completely round the twist - causing multiple contusions, bloodshed and fifty grands worth of bar room damage.

Something Westmonster Magistrates Court might consider favorably on March 7th when Joyce appears to answer charges?

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