Written by dulcie gabbani
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Wednesday, 15 February 2012

Producers of the award winning Irish sitcom Mrs Browns Boys, have announced that foul mouthed TV chef Gordon Ramsey is to star as Agnes Brown in the forthcoming UK stage production. The UK's undisputed swearmiester was the big prize the shows makers had been hoping to bag for a long time. A spokesman said "Sure, tis great to have a foul mouthed fekker like Gordon on board, as we had been undecided as to whether UK audiences would understand what fekking this and fekking that was all about". "So we thought it would be better to get an English actor (or chef) to get the swearing across without it losing a bit in translation. We like the way Gordon says "fuck" after every other word, which would make him the ideal stand in for Mrs Brown, who says "feck" after every other word".

A spokesman for Gordons production company, Effenjeff, said "Its great news for the old gobshite, as TV work had dried up lately. In fact Gordon is going to acting classes to perfect his swearing.


When asked what he thought of his new role, Mr Ramsey told our reporter "It's none of your fucking business you nosey twat, fuck off".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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