Written by Tommy Twinkle
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Thursday, 5 January 2012

image for Many Youngsters Still Refusing To Work For Nothing!
Unpaid Worker!

The government is to finally clamp down hard on unemployed work-shy youths who refuse to work for nothing.

The promise to deal with the problem of 'youths with principles' who continue to expect to be paid for their labour was made by the Prime Minister today after it had been brought to his attention that government studies had found that many Job Centre youth customers fail to turn up for 4 week unpaid work training opportunities.

Even worse is that it is suspected that some 20% of them simply prefer to sign off when told they will have to work for nothing.

The government says a major problem is that after a young person has signed off for a while they then know that they can sign on again a few months later as fresh claimants to again receive benefits for several months before having another unpaid work opportunity offered to them.

It is suspected that some of them have been doing undeclared paid work all along. The remainder are thought to be signing off for a few months then getting through the period with help from their hard working parents.

Says Prime Minister David Cameron, "This loophole of parents subsidising them is something I am determined to eliminate. Obviously we could make it illegal for parents to do this, but it would not be an easy thing to prove. So instead I have informed the Job Centre people that from now on they will be able to tell any young customer who comes through the doors to sign on that they now have to be willing to accept any unpaid work opportunity offered to them from the very first day of signing.

"Let's see how many parents can afford to subsidise these work-shy youths on a permanent basis. Not many I hope. Meanwhile the government will of course continue to inflict more austerity measures on these mollycoddling parents to make it ever more difficult for them to be able to afford to support even themselves let alone their offspring."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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