Written by queen mudder
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Sunday, 11 December 2011

image for Charles vows to stop shagging sheep in 2012; 'Bah, Humbug!' say Badger Face Welsh Mountain rams
Not taking it lying down after years of faithfull service

Wales - Their distinctive eye-framing black stripes continue from chin to belly and nether regions beyond ending in an anal 'x marks the spot' for the visually impaired.

The flock's 1979 prenup with Charles guarantees certain conjugal rites in perpetuity as long as each shall live.

"They're Charles' favorites along with some hornless Beulah Speckled Faces," a Palace flunkey explained today.

But all that could end by New Year's Day as a Queen's Diamond Jubilee filial promise to abstain from ovine 'relations' kicks in.

The Prince of Wales must now give up his prized Welsh flock and settle for more politically correct Bluefaced Leicesters - famed for their broad muzzles, generous mouths and a tendency towards a 'Roman' nose. (Bollox - 'Ed').

Camilla's Christmas present of 25 Derbyshire Gritstones is also given the royal nod by way of their handsome, aristocratic lineage, big flat bones, strong rump and kinky what-have-you.

"It's a better class of shaggable sheep," a Highgrove shepherd confided this afternoon, "immune from rectal warts and burrowing maggots.

"Care for a test run on Christmas Eve?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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