Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Wednesday, 12 October 2011

image for Lewis Court Seeks Solomon To Decide Cat Case

Authorities in Stornoway are seeking a legal expert named Solomon.

They need the legal wizard to decide an argument between two women about who owns a cat.

The case has dragged on for months as Della Macdonald and Nicola Dempster both claim ownership of the moggy. Ms Macdonald knows the black and white feline as Oscar, while Ms Dempster calls him Smudge.

Said a spokesman for the Stornoway legal authorities: "This is a puzzler all right - it's got all the makings of a biblical story.

"So we have decided to appeal for a legal expert going by the name of Solomon.

"Piece of cake... he picks up a sword and suggests the cat's cut in two and each woman gets a half. But - and here's the clever bit - he knows the cat's real owner loves it so much she'd rather give it up than see it killed.

"And lo! The problem will be solved."

Legal eagles called Solomon should apply to Stornoway Sherrif court. Sharpish.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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