Written by Rebel Not Taken
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Sunday, 3 July 2011

image for David Haye's broken toe demands rematch with "lucky"  Klitschko

Boxer David Haye's broken toe has failed in it's attempt to become undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the World.

The one inch broken toe was outpointed over 12 rounds by Russian giant Wladimir Klitschko in Hamburg last night.

Irish flyweight Barry McGuigan told fight fans that giving away more than 17 stone and conceding a 6ft 6"reach advantage to the towering Ukranian was always going to be a big ask for the little toe:

"The wee toe is just a pumped up digit and not a natural Heavyweight" explained the Irishman.

After the bout McGuigan told viewers that the toe had got it's tactics wrong:

"The broken toe was picked off by Klitschko's jab and never got close enough to work inside and unload it's body shots."

The 'trash talking' broken toe claims to have won the mental battle with the half witted Russian, but David 'The Haymaker' Haye explained to viewers that the boring Wladimir wasn't prepared to "'mix it" and "go to war" with the broken toe and instead adopted a cautious strategy of "getting on his bike" and hoping to "nick it on the judge's cards."

The broken toe's trainers will wait for the bruising to go down before deciding whether to demand a rematch with the useless Wladimir.

They may even sidestep him altogether and challenge his elder and even bigger brother Vitali.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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