Written by Monkey Woods
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Wednesday, 27 April 2011

image for Wolverhampton Wanderers Manager Mick McCarthy May Lose Council House If Wolves Are Relegated
The McCarthy residence today

The nipsy of Mick McCarthy, the Wolverhampton Wanderers manager, was twitching this morning after it was revealed that, should the Premier League club be relegated to the Championship at the end of the season, then the Yorkshireman may face losing his Council house property as a result.

McCarthy, 52, was housed in the three-bedroomed property in Ettingshall as part of his lucrative contract when he arrived at Molineux in 2006, in what was seen as an emergency housing measure, but he has never moved out, claiming that he 'gets on well with the neighbours'.

Council tenants must reside in a property for a qualifying period of five years before they are entitled to put in an application to purchase it, but if the Council decide to evict McCarthy before his qualifying period is completed, he will not have the chance of buying the property outright, becoming the first homeless Premier League manager.

Now, with Wolves rooted in 19th spot on 33 points, and with tricky away fixtures at Birmingham and Sunderland, and home matches against Blackburn and, next up, arch-rivals West Brom to come, things are looking extremely dodgy for Barnsley-born Mick.

McCarthy, however, at least knows he has the full backing of Wanderers supporters. One fan sent a heartfelt message attached to a brick, which he launched through the manager's bedroom window recently, saying simply:

"Fuck off, McCarthy!"

The former Republic of Ireland international told reporters after last night's 3-0 reverse at Stoke City:

"Rules is rules. Wiv got ta ... stick at it. It's not over till the fat lady sings, is it. But ah cud 'ear 'er singin at the end o'me back garden this mornin, so wid best pull us socks up sharpish!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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