Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 19 December 2010

image for Dallas Cowboys Quarterback Tony Romo Completes A Touchdown Pass To Girlfriend Candice Crawford
An autographed football that Tony Romo gave to his finacée Candy Crawford.

DALLAS - Tony Romo, the quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys, has just completed the greatest pass in his NFL career, a touchdown pass to blonde girlfriend Candice Crawford.

Tony and his beautiful girlfriend were having dinner at The Fifty Yard Line Bar & Grill in Downtown Dallas where they were both enjoying a full rack of baby back ribs.

Half way through their meal Romo put down his knife and fork, reached into his coat pocket, and pulled out a dazzling diamond ring. Candy's eyes got real big. Tony asked her if she would be his wife. She responded by saying only if he would be her husband.

A confused Romo smiled and yelled out at the top of his lungs, "My girlfriend said yes y'all! Now that's a damn touchdown pass!"

Crawford, who is 24, is a news anchor for television station KDAF in Dallas. She is a former Miss Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex Beauty Pageant winner as well as a former Hooters Girl, a Playboy Bunny, and a Bountyhunter Lounge pole dancer.

Tony said that the thing that first attracted her to him was the fact that she could balance her entire sensuously sexy body on the strippers pole just by using her two pinkies.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: And let me state so that there is no misunderstanding or confusion here that the two pinkies refers to Crawford's two little fingers on her hands and not to her two pencil eraser nipples on her breasts.]

Romo was asked by their waitress, Odessa Slothington, if he had talked over his decision to get engaged with the owner of the Dallas Cowboys Jerry Jones before hand.

Tony rolled his eyes and replied, "No, I have decided that Mr. Jones is not going to dictate to me who I can have as a girlfriend or who I can marry. I allowed him to come between me and Jessica Simpson last year, but I made a vow to myself that I would never let him ever play that friggin game again."

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Jerry Jones basically told Romo in no uncertain terms back when he was dating the bosomy Jessica Simpson that he wanted him to break up with her because he considered her to be a jinx. Romo remarked that back then he had no choice but to follow Jones instructions because he had threatened to trade him to the lowly Detroit Lions if he refused.]

Tony says that he is proud of his fiancée who he says has a degree in crop rotating from Solid State University where she was a sorority member of Phi Beta Labia.

He then added that Candy will be in the stands during the Cowboys games and unlike Jessica Simpson or Kim Kardashian who dated Cowboys receiver Miles Austin, Candy will not be wearing a disguise.

Romo grinned and said that Candy will be proudly wearing his number 9 football jersey and if team owner Jones says anything about her being a jinx he will purposely throw an interception each freakin time he mentions Candy being a jinx.

In a related story. Tony's ex-girlfriends Jessica Simpson and Carrie Underwood each said that they are not bitter about Tony's engagement but hope that number 9 fumbles the ball five or six times a game.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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