Written by C. Cranium
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Topics: Baseball, Cricket

Friday, 17 December 2010

image for Jeter Dumps Yankees and Becomes Hindu
Jeter becomes bowler

Derrick Jeter, frustrated by lack of new big honking contract, has forsaken baseball for cricket and Christianity for Hinduism.

Effective March 1, 2011 Derek Jeter will suit up in the orange and more orange of the Mumbai Monkeys. Contract and Salary negotiations went by quickly as Mumbai didn't have the 40 million dollars Jeters' agent, Billy McGee, was asking. McGee finally agreed to 40 million rupees, which sounded fair to him being exchange rate challenged.

Jeter is also making a big move in the field to the position of bowler. Jeter commented that, " I always fantasized about being a pitcher and now Ganesha has led me to bowling". Jeter will enter an extensive training regimen after the Christmas holidays which his extended family has planned. Jeter will begin playing in February for the Pune Pinones triple A farm club and is expected to move to the Monkeys in March.

Macy Monotone, long time Jeter girlfriend and singer for the Wet Slobbers, has announced that she is also a Hindu convert and will follow Derrick to Mumbai. Monotone hopes to start a family with the former Yankee.

The baseball community is stunned by the Jeter announcement and commissioner Bud Selig released a statement that, "All religions are welcome in baseball, especially Hindu".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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