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Monday, 2 August 2010

image for NBA Star Dennis Rodman Beats Range Rover To Death On Florida Highway
ABOVE: NBA Star Dennis Rodman, who averaged 13.1 rebounds per game for his entire career.

Hugely underrated NBA Dennis Rodman was involved in a physical altercation with a green Range Rover this weekend.

Sources close to Dennis say the former NBA star was the passenger in a green Range Rover traveling on I-95 in Fort Lauderdale, FL when one of the tires blew out. Angered that the blowout would delay his trip, Dennis began pummeling the auto, flipping it over three times. It was only when passersby pulled Rodman off of the 6,019 lb vehicle did the fracas end.

Mr. Rodman suffered a cut to his finger. The automobile was pronounced dead at the scene.

Rodman, a talented, physical defender who played during a time when the NBA valued scorers above all else, won back-to-back championships in 1989 and 1990, with the Detroit Pistons, then went on to win three more championships in '96, '97, and '98 with the Chicago Bulls.

Rodman averaged 13.1 rebounds for his caree

Some of the people who pulled Rodman off of the mortally wounded truck later asked for autographs, but Rodman politely beat the sh-t out of them as well.

Police say that Rodman will not be charged in the vehicle's death because, well, it was "actin' a fool, and got what it needed to get."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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