ARGENTINA 0 GERMANY 4 - It was the result that nobody expected in the World Cup quarter final between these two footballing giants last night, and after the fourth goal had gone in, the disconsolate Argentine coach Diego Maradona summed up the feelings of his players when he grabbed a vuvzela from a spectator, and shoved it up his own arse.
Maradona, who, in the 1986 finals in Mexico, wrote his name into the history books with the famous 'Hand of God' goal against England, metaphorically penned another chapter in South Africa under the working title of the 'Horn of God', as he stood on the touchline, bent double in pain, with the plastic instrument barely visible poking out of his chocolate starfish.
German Chancellor Angela Merkel, who was at the game to watch her German team make it into the semi-finals, said:
"Zat looks a bit Messi!"
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