Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 7 June 2010

image for The New Orleans Hornets To Change Their Name To The New Orleans Tar Balls
The BP Gulf of Mexico oil rig is now responsible for having released over 89 trillion tar balls into the Gulf waters.

NEW ORLEANS -Gary Chouest, owner of the NBA New Orleans Saints has just announced at a corporate breakfast that he has decided to change the name of his basketball team.

Chouest said that his team's recent 32-41 record is not the reason for his decision. He stated that there are really two reasons for the name change.

The first is that he has been wanting to change the name ever since he bought the team and moved it to New Orleans from Charlotte in 2002.

He said that although everyone knows that there are millions of hornets in the Charlotte area there are none in New Orleans.

Chouest went on to say, "Yes we have bumble bees, honey bees, yellow jackets, mud daubers, wasps, and what the locals refer to as bayou bees, which are inbred bastardized bees crossed between the skeeter bees and the bubba bees but no hornets.

The New Orleans team owner also stated that he has received hundreds of letters, emails, text messages, and phone calls from fans of his team asking him to please change the team's name because of the connotation that the name Hornets invokes.

Chouest said that he had not realized it before but the team name has the word "Ho" at the beginning and as everyone in the South and some people living in other parts of the country such as Detroit, Harlem, Watts, and Pittsburgh know the two letter word is a euphemism for the word "Whore."

He said many fans and citizens pointed out that the name is the direct opposite of the NFL Super Bowl champion New Orleans Saints.

Chouest said that he has decided to honor the wishes of his dedicated and devoted fans and go with a more localized New Orleans name.

He said that he has chosen a name that not only people in Louisiana, but people throughout the nation and even the world will quickly identify as having a New Orleans flavor.

So when the 2010-2011 NBA season starts off in October, The new name of The New Orleans Hornets will be The New Orleans Tar Balls.

SIDENOTE: The New Orleans basketball organization has just announced that the new team colors will be oil spill black and tar ball black.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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