Written by rvler9201
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Sunday, 3 January 2010

JACKSONVILLE, FL-Though his team will be watching the playoffs at home, Jaguars quarterback David Garrard was able to enter the off-season with his head held high, capturing Crohn's Disease Monthly's coveted "Athlete of the Year" honor for a record fourth consecutive season.

"This is really a milestone for me," said Garrard. "I never dreamed, when I was diagnosed with Crohn's, that I would be able to produce at such a high level in this league. For CDM to honor me like this, it's really a dream come true."

The award moves Garrard into first-place on the all-time list, breaking his tie with former tight end Chris Gedney, who captured three from 1997-99. Gedney called Garrard yesterday to congratulate him on breaking his record.

"I told how happy I was for him and offered my best wishes," said Gedney. "I know what it takes to achieve such a milestone."

CDM's article went on to praise Garrard's standing as one of the most famous people with Crohn's.

"David possesses many of the qualities that we at CDM value," wrote Editor-in-chief Andrew Wilkinson. "Namely, having Crohn's disease and being famous."

Garrard says he hopes the award show the world that people with Crohn's are capable of living normal lives and being productive members of society, which for Garrard means "getting the hell out of Jacksonville."

Make rvler9201's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 multiplied by 5?

6 24 10 18

Go to top