Oakland, CA - The Chargers beat the Raiders tonight by tossing a midget holding a football far over the defensive line, who then landed on his feet and crossed the goal line after a short run, on short legs. The coach of the Raiders was available after the game for this interview.
The dour coach of the Raiders is seeking a new short end receiver who will be small enough to hide behind the ball. "I want our quarterback to be able to throw him with a good spiral", the coach of the Raiders quipped. "We are looking to draft a preschool student; one that is small for his age. We might even consider a female.
"We'd like them to be able to run between the legs of the defensive players, just like that little Charger midget does. Also, we plan to inflate the ball with hydrogen to make it easier for our little player to carry."