Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Boxing

Thursday, 18 September 2008

image for Amir Khan To Fight Man With No Fists
Watch his chin!

Amir Khan, the British fighter who was knocked out within the blink of an eye in his last bout, is keen to protect his fragile reputation from further damage in his next one, and is to face a boxer with no fists.

Khan was pulverised by Breidis Prescott recently, and went down like an eager prostitute when the Colombian struck him heartily on his world-renowned Glass Chin.

Now, the Bolton lad's manager has selected an opponent who should pose few problems to his weakness, because of his lack of punching ability.

Amos Dolt lost both his hands in a Yardie accident in Jamaica three years ago, and took up boxing when he found he was unable to continue banana-picking. He is known as 'a bit of a jabber', and relies heavily on this, rather than on a knockout punch.

Khan spoke from his Glasshouse Gym today, and through a translator, said:

"Am gonna knock 'im out! Ar might be a bit daft, but ar can beat this guy. Av just got t' believe in me ability. I won't make them same mistakes that ar did with that MP's son. It'll be diff'rent, am tellin ya! Proper! Wicked! Large! Innit!?!??"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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