Written by Monkey Woods
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Friday, 5 September 2008

image for Robinho: A Crybaby In The Paula Radcliffe Mould
A ball belonging to MCFC

Real Madrid President Ramon Calderon has said in an interview in Spain, that Robinho, Manchester City's new £33million Brazilian signing, is nothing but a crybaby straight out of the Paula Radcliffe mould.

Radcliffe, the British long-distance runner, never stops crying, particularly when the cameras start rolling on her, and she has now given her name to the condition of 'relentless bawling' amongst the very rich and spoilt.

Robinho, says Snr Calderon, cries at anything, and will not be consoled, just like a child that can't get its own way. Often, he sits and sulks in a corner after training if things haven't gone well.

It's not the kind of thing City manager Mark Hughes wants to hear as he tries to build a team around the Brazilian brat. Hughes is already looking over his shoulder in the wake of the Kevin Keegan and Alan Curbishley debacles, and will not want to upset the newest member of his squad more than he has to.

Said Hughes on the subject of Robinho this morning:

"We're using our footballs in training, just in case he threatens to take his home."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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