Written by WOOD MONKEYS
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Monday, 7 July 2008

image for Barton Boys Spring Barton
But we don't care

Some of those loveable little urchins last seen on panorama getting high and packing heat. Have in what is being described as an event you did not need a crystal ball to see, sprung pal joey from the big house, were he was imprisoned for take away food shop offences.

Whilst it is known that these drivelling schoolkids rarely leave their home turf, it is believed that young tristian had managed to twoc a mini bus and a Bentley from a small Lancashire village called Blackburn for "the job".

In a show of bravado and derring do they filmed the great escape on their nokia erection 60 mobile phones just so they could actually prove they were there.

A passing journalist recognizing what was going down and realising his ill advised comments and musings in his local could be misconstrued in some way, posed the question, with a worried look on his face, "can you read sonny".

We may never know the answer to this question, the little scallywag's reply was the usual one and they carried merrily on their way to the chicken nugget take away with Uncle Joey, for food, a food fight, and fight with some team mates.(no guns allowed) before getting back on board the mini bus in order to get home for their bed times.

The dead journalist was named as A Nobody of the Local Daily Bore. Police have in custody 127 drivelling schoolkids who all claim to have done it and can damn well prove it.

Sparticus Barton aged 13 claims he was in his local youth club playing table tennis all night and many witnesses agree that indeed he was.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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