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Wednesday, 30 January 2008

image for Stuart Pearce named as head ball boy at Wembley

After an unsuccessful start to his management career with Manchester City and England Under 21's, Fabio Cappello has made Stuart Pearce Head ball boy at all England internationals. The move comes after fierce demands by Stuart Pearce, wrote to Sir Jimmy Saville. In the 22 page letter, Pearce explained what experience he could bring to the ball boys and the England set up.

Jimmy Saville, arranged it for Pearce to start working for the F.A as head ball boy, in payment of sweets and Corgi toy cars. Stuart Pearce will control the southgate of Wembley with Gareth Southgate and Little Shaun Wright-Phillips.

Cappello is impressed with his new ball boy and plans to buy the whole of the ball boys sweets and pizza after every match. Sir Trevor Brooking has called the move to appoint an English ball boy as "Bold" and "Very much required"

Brain Barwick has said in a press conference this afternoon

"Stuart, with his passion and image will be a great asset for all the other ball boys to aspire too"

Tributes and comments are flying in from around the country, at this move to make Stuart Pearce only the second English head ball boy. A position previously held by Boris Becker.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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