Written by Jack Allen
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Thursday, 5 June 2014

image for UKIP at World Cup as Hoddle Signs For ITV
How will Hoddle refer to this tackle?!

UKIP have walked ably into the World Cup coverage team on ITV this summer as Glenn Hoddle has been employed to cover the gap left by Roy "insert insult about someone else" Keane.

Little known to the general public, most UKIP politicians regularly site the former England football manager as their muse when it comes to offending those who are disabled in some form. With UKIP gaining more voters across the nation, their influence has also grown within the media and a pro-UKIP commentator will hopefully create a ratings boost for ITV.

"We hope that hiring Glenn will bring in more viewers than we will lose when our audience realise that we've kept Andy Townsend and Adrian Chiles in our coverage team for the World Cup in Brazil", said Niall Slone, head of sport at ITV.

The reaction to Glenn Hoddle being hired over charismatic pundits such as Gareth Southgate, Michael Gray and Ian Wright has caused substantial shockwaves through social media, as the aforementioned would arguably all heighten the anticipation for each match better than Glenn by using their expert knowledge, stunning range of vocabulary, and boring politically correct views to bring a new level of excitement to the viewers at home.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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