Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 16 May 2013

image for Kentucky Derby Winner Orb May Not Run In The Preakness
If Orb does not start eating his oats he may now be allowed to run in The Preakness.

BALTIMORE - Word coming out of the home of The Preakness is that Kentucky Derby winner, Orb may not be entered to race in the second jewel of the Triple Crown race.

Orb's owner Stuart "Horsey" Janney said that he was told by Orb's nutritionist identified as Ballard Zlickafoose, that the Derby winner is not eating his recommended daily requirement of oats.

Zlickafoose stressed that the oats are fortified with 89 different types of necessary nutrients but for some reason Orb is not touching the oats.

When asked by reporters what Orb is eating to sustain his health they were told that Orb is being allowed to graze on the infield grass at Pimlico.

Redwood Fingerboo, a reporter with The Cucamonga Chit Chat Chronicle pointed out that infield grazing is strictly prohibited by The Pimlico Race Track Book of Rules & Regulations.

Fingerboo was informed that he was indeed right but that Orb's owners managed to pull a few strings and were able to get that rule [Rule 17-9P] waved until the Sunday after the Saturday race.

SIDENOTE: TNT color analyst Charles "Fat Bro" Barkley who bet $100,000 on Orb and ended up winning $1,280,000 says that he is disappointed because he was planning on betting $200,000 on the Kentucky Derby winner.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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