Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 3 May 2013

image for Shaquille O'Neal Turns Down An Offer To Return To The Los Angeles Lakers
Shaq has said that there is no amount of money that would get him to ever play on the same team as Kobe Bryant again.

LOS ANGELES - Former Los Angeles Laker Shaquille O'Neal was in Tinsel Town on some business. He was asked by Sports Territory Magazine's Tango Brisket about the rumor that the Laker ownership has asked him to sign a one-year contract.

O'Neal, who is noted for making deep sounding grunting noises, grunted and grinned as he took sips out of his bottle of Guava Gatorade.

The former Laker center remarked that although he was flattered by the one-year $13 million offer he had to turn it down.

When asked why, the man known as Superman replied that there is just no way that he can ever again play on the same team as Kobe "Diva" Bryant.

Shaq took a deep breath and said that if he were to be around the man who calls himself Vino he would probably end up kicking his butt within 12 minutes.

O'Neal added that he does not need the money and he certainly does not want to end up in jail because of Kobe's immature, hot temper.

In Related News. Jack Nicholson has said that he is seriously thinking about asking the Lakers organization for a refund on his 2013-2014 Laker season tickets.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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