Written by Ossurworld
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Saturday, 6 April 2013

During the off-season of MLB, Blue Jays manager was traded to the Red Sox for Mike Aviles.

You'd think they would be happy to rid of a less than .500 manager in Canada where skating on thin ice is a way of life.

Instead, the crowd at the game on Friday night went bonkers, demanding Barabbas. They incensed crowd felt like they had found the equivalent of Benedict Arnold for the Maple Leaf crowd.

John Farrell returned to Canada where baseball has been the victim of high sticking on a daily basis. In a park that is quieter than the Toronto Public Library, brazen bullies were calling for the head of John Farrell, Red Sox manager who was once an honorary member of the Mounties.

Those in the crowd who were silent were knitting like Madame DeFarge, now living in Quebec. She merely wanted Farrell's head on a silver platter. Lucky for the Boston television audience, she did not do the dance of the seven veils to achieve her ends.

If Hollywood in its heyday were making a movie about John Farrell, Al Pacino would play him like Scarface.

If Canada knew anything about baseball, they would not have treated Farrell like Ty Cobb. No armed policemen were called to the park to protect the Sox manager.

Blue Jay fans started throwing anything not nailed down when Farrell in his best Dudley Do-Right demeanor casually tipped his cap to his three adoring but closeted fans who cowered in the stands.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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