Written by Ossurworld
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Saturday, 23 February 2013

Celtics bleed green blood like a hemophiliac from some star system in the outer universe. You have to live on the Moon made from green cheese to know about bleeding green.

Kevin Garnett refused any trades because he was a Celtic for life -and also till death do them part. He would not shed a drop of his green blood.

Reports stated that Clipper Chris Paul and told KG that the trade would occur if the Celtic superstar was willing.

Barkus may have been willing in David Copperfield, but Garnett was unwilling. He may have turned Danny Ainge into Miss Haversham before the fire with an incalcitrant attitude.

If you have Great Expectations, you are just another Pip looking for a banner with #18 on it.

The trade deadline passed without so much as a drop of Celtic blood spilled. Oh, they sent Leandro Barbosa to a better place and let the blood rise from Jason Collins, but he was playing like Barnabas Collins from Dark Shadows.

If the sight of blood makes you faint, then KG will make sure his Celtics blood never frightens you. He is not taking a knife to the back for a chance to win a championship out in Clipperland.

KG was not the only one to avoid bloodletting. Paul Pierce managed to keep his Celtic blood from being given to resuscitate another team.

All this means the new Big Three (if you count Rondo as the Celtics version of Dracula) will continue to molder in the crypt as they wait for the sweet darkness to engulf them.

Lucky the Leprechaun will keep his pot of gold and his green blood-at least until the off-season.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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