Written by Ossurworld
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Sunday, 2 December 2012

Red Sox GM Ben Cherington did not do himself or the fans any favors with his latest in-depth interview with Boston's ravenous media.

Having been denied both red meat about the Red Sox and cream puffs to toss around, the media asked Mr. Cherington about the sounds of silence. The media is now in the final stages of living at Donner's Pass.

Next stop will be cooking up Cherington at the Winter Meetings on the Hot Stove.

Cherington insisted that Nashville will provide some noise, a cacophony of movement among teams. He failed to point out that all the important players have been scooped up off the barroom floor.

Grasshopper Ben insisted that he is on a long journey, like a leaf floating along the river, ready to hit the rapids before making a splash as it tumbles off the waterfall. Yes, his metaphor revealed the angst and unconscious mind that Freud always warned us about.

The Red Sox are a little canoe of Hiawatha along the rich banks of Gitche Gumee, all owned by John Henry. There you will find the teepee of Ben facing the purple clouds of sunset.

The media resembles the old woman Nokomis pointing westward to Ben, telling him the day is already done.

Ben will sail upon the Gitche Gumee until he makes a splash over the waterfall. There will not be much of a splash when the canoe breaks into pieces as the 2013 season begins.

Perhaps Larry Lucchino will give Ben a barrel to hide in as he goes over those deadly falls. As Cherington noted, it is easy to do something stupidÂ…like believe the Red Sox will contend next season?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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