Written by Monkey Woods
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Tuesday, 16 October 2012

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This man's brother might be signing for Barnsley

Manchester United and England star Wayne Rooney has this evening been sensationally linked with Championship side Barnsley after the Tykes offered forward John Rooney - Wayne's brother - a contract until the end of the season, subject to international clearance.

The 21-year-old has been on trial at Oakwell after leaving American side Orlando City.

John started his career with Macclesfield, then moved to the MLS side New York Red Bulls in 2011. He struggled in New York because he's not very good, and moved to third tier Orlando after just one season.

Having failed to impress even this dismal outfit, he has now been given the chance to resurrect his career at a club of whom it was once said, were "just like watching Brazil".

The writer of this story wishes to apologise to readers who may have opened this story thinking it contained useful, interesting and exciting information about the Manchester United and England star Wayne Rooney.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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