Written by Jaggedone
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Monday, 2 July 2012

image for Andy Murray drives his female fans to knitting!
Andy can get "knitted" if he blows his chance again!

Female Andy Murray fans have come up with a great way of watching the great British hope stumble through his games at Wimbledon; they knit during the games because although Andy is a Brit, he's a pretty boring one.

Female British "once a year tennis fans" don't care if Andy is not quite a dashing Federer, Nadal or Agassi, they just want a Brit to win the damn thing and if it means plodder Andy bashing away over five sets, they don't care because they can either fall asleep or knit in between sets.

The tabloids and TV have observed how the "knitty women" keep on knitting through every serve, volley, rally or even tie-breaks because they're pretty bored actually. Many true tennis fans who would love to have a seat in centre court are being deprived of the opportunity because it's obvious these women were given their tickets by corporate businesses (who get the biggest allocations) and although they don't give a "toss" about tennis, they just want to be there when history is made and a Brit reaches the final at last!

Only Wimbeldon Brit mens winner, Fred Perry, also took up knitting in his later days and set up a clothing business, so these nutty knitters are keeping up a wonderful Wimbledon tradition. Let's hope they don't get their knitting knotted when Andy serves for the match in the final (Or am I just a knit-wit dreamer?).

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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