Keyser Söze reappears after 15 year absence. Oh Shit!

Terror has swept across the whole planet because Keyser Söze has suddenly resurfaced after disappearing completely in 1995, when he was only supposed to be having a short romantic break with Pete Kobayashi Postlethwaite.

What was at first thought to be a reign of terror by his doppelganger John Doe, whose deeds the documentary film Se7en followed and who was a particularly bad bastard, pales into insignificance now that Keyser Söze is back.

NB:John Doe is not actually his real name, he can never remember it due to all the medication he is on. He thinks his first name might be Kelvin or Kevin perhaps, but can never remember his own last name because he is always far too Spacey!

The usual suspects had all been checked out and all had alibis.

It couldn't have been Hannibal Lecter. That was obvious straight away, as all the livers and brains of the various victims found so far had no sign of cheeky little nibbles, and nuzzles, or had a spoon dipped in them.

Also, no crates of Chianti had been bought from Bargain Booze, which was always a dead giveaway of Lecter's involvement. Smart though he was, that was how they always ended up catching the sometime charming Welsh cannibal.

That and staggering around various town and city centres worldwide, sniffing and drunkenly shouting at young ladies, "I CAN SMELL YOUR..."(we will leave it there...), were Lecter's modus operandi. Lecter had never been arrested doing this though, in any country, as he blended in with about 20% of the men in whichever area, of whatever Country he was prowling.

It was always the damn credit card reciept at Bargain Booze when he bought a case or three of Chianti that did for him. No, this definately wasn't Lecter.

It couldn't have been many others either... It was a great shock to find it was neither Lecter or Doe and the Security Forces of every country in the world were baffled as to who was causing Armageddon to befall the whole of Mankind.

Then, one day, recently, somewhere, a little shrill voice squeeked in a Security Centre somewhere,

"Thank goodness that Keyser Söze vanished off the face of the Earth 15 years ago, eh?"

Three people in the room died immediately just on hearing the name, one had a heart attack and another had a stroke, (which he got away with because everybody else were to busy being horrified at the mention of, "He who shall not be named.")

That was it, the awful truth started to hit home. The squeek became a squalk. The sqaulk became a screech. The screech became shriek, that travelled quickly to all parts of the globe.

This is it, the end game....

This reign of terror is definately being caused by Keyser Söze, and Keyser Söze doesn't get caught. This time he is going to "Get" each and every one of us, there is no way out of it......"And like that, he's gone.".......

_{Make Chris's day - rate this story with the stars, they're just down there!}