US Congress to ban the 'N' word from English language!

Washington, DC - The United States Congress has supported a plan to ban the 'N' word from public use and from all dictionary printings. In fact, in order to play it even more safe, Congress has voted to ban the letter 'N' as well!

Pundits, writers, and academies across the country are in a quandry over the future of the letter 'N'! Even teachers, in a apparent move to become politically correct, have taken pliers to thousands of classroom keyboards, plucking the 'N' from the keyboard barring any potential future use.

Thousands of adolescents with names like Ned, Norbit, Nat, Natalie, Nancy, Naomi, Nona, and Nola have become distraught over having their names abruptly changed!

To ease the suffering, Congress will be addressing the issue and will mandate automatic and pre-selected names to all who are affected. Called the N-Name Bailout, it reportedly will cost the US Treasury over $50 Billion dollars to process and re-direct politically correct non-'N' names to citizens.

Citizens who find themselves with special 'N' needs, or fit the newly established 'N' disabled category should contact 1-222-2223 and request a free form.

In a recent article about Nashville artists, writer Paul Wang submitted an essay...'Life Without N'!

Paul Wang: 'I live in -ashville all my life and its the heart of Te--essee, -ot far from the Burlingto- River. Writi-g is extremely hard o-ce you omit the letter -. I do hope Co-gress reco-siders the effect of living life without -.'

His life was not totally without 'N', as Wang died when he fell from a bridge over his beloved Burlington River!

Congress will soon take up the important process of banning the popular words 'Niggerly', 'Oreo', 'Spook' and 'Reneger' once it returns to session.

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