Jan Moir says floods are "punishment from God"

The Daily Mail's resident sociopath, Jan Moir, has said the recent floods in Cockermouth are punishment from God.

Writing in Nick Griffin's favourite paper, Moir said: "Calling a town Cockermouth is simply disgusting. It's yet another example of what a gay, liberal, atheistic society we live in that a town can be allowed to have such a smutty name."

The clinically obese writer continued: "I have no sympathy for the residents of Cockermouth. These floods are not a disaster. They are a message from God that he will not tolerate us refusing to hang homosexuals in public."

This is not the first time a major disaster has been attributed to an act of punishment by the fictional sky-alien that simple, brainwashed people call God. The late Rev Jerry Falwell said 9/11 was God's response to single mothers, homosexuals, feminists and liberals. Falwell himself died of a heart attack a couple of years ago. His acolytes refused to comment on whether his sudden premature death was also an act by their imaginary friend.

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