Showing the very latest breaking spoof news snippets. You can use the calendar on the right to browse through the most recent breaking news snippets.

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Tour De France cyclist's non - taking of drugs

A cyclist in this year's Tour De France may be dope - free, it's emerged. However, the Swiss racer has tested positive for Lemsip. 'The guy's a slave to Paracetomol', says non - Swiss Doctor

written by Ella Davide, 05 July 2015
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Tour De France cyclist's non - taking of drugs

A cyclist in this year's Tour De France may be dope - free, it's emerged. However, the Swiss racer has tested positive for Lemsip. 'The guy's a slave to Paracetomol', says non - Swiss Doctor

written by Ella Davide, 05 July 2015
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Best of Five?

Princess Charlotte's Five Godparents Revealed.....Dopey. Sneezy, Grumpy, Bashful and Sleepy....Doc and Happy reportedly well pissed off!

written by Herrdoktorfox, 05 July 2015
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Greece to record their own version of the Grease soundtrack in attempt to solve debt crisis.

Tracks include:

Euro the One that I Want,
Hopelessly Devoted to the EU,
Greeced Banking,
Blue Doom,
It's Raining On Referendum Night,

& the timeless classic,

Economics School Dropout.

written by Simon Saunders, 02 July 2015
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Kerry Deals With Hostage Crisis

A spokesman for the U.S. State Department announced that Secretary of State John Kerry has been taken hostage by Iranian terrorists and is involved in negotiations demanding his immediate release.

written by Dick Sheerer, 02 July 2015
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East-West Trade Pact Signed

Representatives from the US and China consummated a major economic agreement that allows China to dump cheap junk on American markets, and it permits the US to saturate China with expensive junk.

written by Dick Sheerer, 02 July 2015
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Emperor Proclaims Cuba Is Part of the Empire & Announces A New Celebration

Barack I proclaimed Cuba is now part of his Empire. The Emperor also revealed that henceforward July will be KissACastroOnThe Ass month, so all dutiful serfs in the Empire had better pucker up PDQ.

written by Trinculoman, 01 July 2015
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Balotelli for United!

I actually think Balotelli would be a great buy for United! Am I mad?

written by Jaggedone, 01 July 2015
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Imperial Palace Announces New Prestigious Appointment

Barack I has named Justice John Roberts as Lord Chancellor of Obamacare with specific authority to condemn all those AntiO'Carelamic terrorists to be waterboarded in perpetuity at Guantanamo Bay Keep.

written by Trinculoman, 30 June 2015
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Trump Announces Post-Presidential Election Mandate

His Donaldship revealed:new Capital will be Atlantic City renamed Trumptopia; guys must wear Trump wigs; gals must wear skimpy handmaiden togs & be his 'Apprentices';and Rosie O'Donnell to be skinned.

written by Trinculoman, 30 June 2015
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Isis Desperate

Running out of people to behead, Isis militants have begun beheading themselves... for Allah.

written by Auntie Matter, 30 June 2015
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Pythagoras evicted from his cave!

The ghost of Pythagoras has been evicted from his cave on Samos because he hasn't paid a drachma in tax. Angie Merkel thought it was sad and hopes Greece will also be evicted!

written by Jaggedone, 29 June 2015
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Supreme Court Will Issue Definitive Decision Next Tuesday

At end of 2015 term US Supreme Court will issue its most definitive decision to date,mandating that all in US must now be GAY.Activists celebrate,while religious adherents prep for guerilla warfare.

written by Trinculoman, 28 June 2015
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Divorcee Cuts Everything In Half!

Shitsville, Arkansas - An angry man took every possession him and his ex-wife had, and cut it in half - including Flopsy, the Shih-Tzu. "What-? said Ronny to the judge, "I gave the bitch both halves!"

written by Paul Blake, 28 June 2015
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US Celebrates Peace On July 4th

In a historic reconciliatory humanitarian gesture the United States will release all terrorists from secret prisons so they can enjoy 4th of July activities, particularly making pyrotechnical devices.

written by Dick Sheerer, 28 June 2015
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Gay Marriage Law Prevails In Supreme Court

Heterosexual Americans are outraged at the controversial verdict handed down from the high court legalizing gay marriages. The ruling outlaws all marriages between men and women unless they are gay.

written by Dick Sheerer, 28 June 2015
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Santorum's Presidential Key Wish Evokes Classic Movie Character

Close insiders at Campaign Santorum know that their hopeful's key wish for a Presidential victory would be like that of the Scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz -- to somehow obtain a brain.

written by Trinculoman, 27 June 2015
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Donald Trump bans Scottish Nationalists from playing at his golf course

Apparently bags of human excrement dumped at the 19th hole proved DNA positive for ScotsGnats' leader Nicola Sturgeon, yuck!

written by queen mudder, 27 June 2015
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Cardinal Dolan and Gov Chris Christie freak out about gay marriage ruling

Critics respond that they two old fogeys will just have to get a divorce like all other warring couples

written by queen mudder, 27 June 2015
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WTF '20 gay-marriage jokes that ultimately helped lobotomize it?'

Surely, legitimize it??

written by queen mudder, 27 June 2015
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Woman climbs up flagpole, takes down Confederate Flag and hoists own panties

Cheering locals then snap her descent down the flagpole and post pics on their InstaBareFannyGram accounts

written by queen mudder, 27 June 2015
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Rand Paul Plans For the Future Post-Presidential Race

When his Presidential aspirations finally flush out, Rand Paul plans to team up with his Dad to go on the road with a dual crackpot Libertarian rapping act called The Hillbilly Isolato-Fed Busters.

written by Trinculoman, 27 June 2015
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Secretary Kerry Off to Paris In Preparation for Vienna

Kerry is off to Paris to refresh his slime factor in the sewers, then it's on to Vienna to slither into a nukeselloutscam with Iranian terrorists. All cheer at Emperor's court; while Mideast shudders.

written by Trinculoman, 26 June 2015
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Courtney Love flashes pussy at Parisian protestors!

Courtney Love Cobain (who?) escaped the Parisian taxi driver riots by opening her knickerless thighs in a taxi and flashed down a horny motorcyclist, he could not refuse and landed in Nirvana!

written by Jaggedone, 25 June 2015
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Sons of Olaf Move to Raise Norwegian Flag Over St. Paul Thwarted

St.Paul,MN:Raising the Norse flag over the capital was thwarted by a band of Somalis who stormed the State House, demanding that their flag be hoisted,but were yet stymied by intrepid Golden Gophers.

written by Trinculoman, 25 June 2015
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Rory McIlroy's Strategy for The Open Has Leaked

Anonymous source from McIlroy's Golf Team reveals #1's plan for the upcoming Open: Soaking Justin Spieth's haggis with milk of magnesia. So, just after the Juster ties off, he's hellbound for the loo.

written by Trinculoman, 24 June 2015
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I will urge Britain's Grenter

I'm plenty up on Euro Stuff, says Jeb Bush

written by Ella Davide, 23 June 2015
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I will urge Britain's Grenter

I'm plenty up on Euro Stuff, says Jeb Bush

written by Ella Davide, 23 June 2015
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Twitter goes MAD!

Twitter has been infiltrated by ex-spoofers spreading madness all over the planet. Owners of Twitter tried to stop the plague, but fell victims of spoof insanity before the straight jackets arrived!

written by Jaggedone, 23 June 2015
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"Paranoid" woman admitted for psychiatric observation

Ima Twit, admitted to a mental health facility for observation after complaining her skinny jeans tried to murder her by "constricting" her to death, said, "They're tighter than a boa constrictor."

written by Gee Pee, 23 June 2015
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Sometimes a headline defeats satire

P Diddy Arrested Over Assault With Deadly Weapon!

written by Herrdoktorfox, 23 June 2015
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Ladbrokes And Gala Coral In Talks Over Merger

..remind me to place a bet at Paddy Power cobber!

written by Herrdoktorfox, 23 June 2015
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Mum Foils Plot To Blow Up Buckingham Palace

................bad Mummy!

written by Herrdoktorfox, 23 June 2015
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Lindsay Graham Will Marry a Cousin if Elected

South Carolina senator and Presidential hopeful, Lindsay Graham, answered all of his nay-sayers, regarding his bachelorhood ways, stating that he has a bevy of good-looking cousins for first lady.

written by Paul Blake, 23 June 2015
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Greek tourists abandon Greek Islands!

Tourists flocking to the sun on Greek Islands have been seen boarding abandoned rowing boats in the hope of escaping those who abandoned them! People smugglers were happy to hold out their hands!

written by Jaggedone, 22 June 2015
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Man United buy 5000 new players!

It has been confirmed that United are so determined to win the EPL again they have purchased 5000 new players according to the Daily Star, a serious tabloid!

written by Jaggedone, 22 June 2015
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Spanish village kills Jews!

An innocent Spanish village called Fort Kill Jews has been forced to change its name because there are no Jews living there and rumours circulating the area swear the mayor is a reincarnated Hitler!

written by Jaggedone, 22 June 2015
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Paris Hilton's "Quote, Unquote"

Social butterfly Paris Hilton's "Quote, Unquote" has just been published. Sample? "At first, I wanted to be a veterinarian, but then I thought, a diet of all fruits and vegetables would get boring."

written by Gee Pee, 22 June 2015
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London Underground Reveals Night Tube Map....

"Let your Oyster start a journey through a strange new world
Leave all thoughts of the life you knew before
Let the tube take you where you long to be.
.....knee deep in vomit on the floor".

written by Herrdoktorfox, 22 June 2015
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Pope's Encyclical Breaks New Ground for Vatican Ventures

CEO Francis of Catholicism Inc,DBA Vatican Ventures hyped VVs latest spinoff: GenuFlectaForecast. His Popeship will be key anchor on the VV Web channel,touting 24/7 the moral hazard of climate change.

written by Trinculoman, 22 June 2015
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Reports claim Simon Cowell's Beatles movie gets major music hacker

Correction! Make that backer.

written by queen mudder, 21 June 2015
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'Astronaut Wives Club' debut bombs aboard International Space Station

Spacemen convinced the show has been faked 'just like NASA's moon landings'

written by queen mudder, 21 June 2015
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Obama waxes lyrical about fatherhood, tampons and the family 'rock'

White House aides freaked out at all that sincerity, insist this is no time to discuss the presidenial Crack Factory

written by queen mudder, 21 June 2015
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GOP now freaked out about Confederate flag above South Carolina Capitol

A pity it's taken right wingers 150 years to twig to hex that's blamed for poisoning latest insance shhoter's feeble brain

written by queen mudder, 21 June 2015
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Obama bin Laden's firstborn wanted his Pa's death certificate

The collector's item described as perfect companion piece to his longform birth certificate

written by queen mudder, 21 June 2015
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Ambassador reveals how Obama underwired Israel

Credits the US president with country's sturdy metal reinforced push-up bra pandemic following floppy Jewish tits criticism

written by queen mudder, 21 June 2015
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Ode to Tony & George, part 2!

Read it, it aint bad!

written by Jaggedone, 21 June 2015
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Chris Christie Is Odd Man Out

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie was formally disqualified from joining the crowded field of republican presidential candidates simply because he's too fat, ruled The Federal Elections Commission.

written by Dick Sheerer, 21 June 2015
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Dog Barks Up Wrong Tree

Early this afternoon, a dog was seen in Central Park barking up a tree. The dog was embarrassed when he realized he had been barking for 30 minutes, and no squirrels were home to answer.

written by Sigmund Von Schaefer, 20 June 2015
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Outdoorsman Fails to Find Elusive Mythical Creatures

After spending 3 weeks searching in Yosemite National Park, outdoorsman Lewis Clark concedes that there is no such thing as happy campers.

written by Sigmund Von Schaefer, 20 June 2015
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