Showing the very latest breaking spoof news snippets. You can use the calendar on the right to browse through the most recent breaking news snippets.

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Alabama's New State Motto

After Tuesday Alabama's state motto, Audemus jura nostra defendere ("We dare defend our rights"), will most likely be changed to Audemus pedophilium nostra defendere ("We dare defend our pedophiles").

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 10 December 2017
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Republicans Decide Al Franken Must Be Executed to Set an Example

Trump tweets his support and reminds voters that Roy Moore never admitted HE did anything wrong.

written by Al N., 09 December 2017
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After Slashing Size of Utah Monuments,Trump Will Next Sub-Divide the Grand Canyon

The portion of the Grand Canyon freed from historical status will be filled in and a casino built.

written by Al N., 06 December 2017
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After Changing Israel Capital to Jerusalem, Trump Changes North Korea's Capital to Seoul

He is also moving the US Embassy for France to London, England, since "it's right next door almost."

written by Al N., 06 December 2017
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Congressman Conyers Names Son to Succeed Him in U.S. House and Confers New Title

Retiring Mich. Rep Conyers proclaims his son as rightful inheritor of his Detroit fiefdom. Jealous of his seniority in the House as King o'Droopy Underpants, he quickly dubs Junior as Knave of Boxers.

written by Trinculoman, 06 December 2017
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Senator Al Franken Claims Special Privilege for Abusing Women

Outed serial abuser Al "Raging Tongue" Franken states it was his right and special privilege to attack women due to his status as a former lame-ass, humor-challenged, narcissistic comedian.

written by Trinculoman, 06 December 2017
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Colin Kaepernick Time's Man Of The Year

Bravo Time magazine for making Colin Kaepernick Man Of The Year. Almost. While Trump has reduced the U.S. to tatters, Kaepernick exemplifies and remains a beacon of hope for the United States.

written by K.C. Bell, 04 December 2017
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Revealed: The Occupation That Loves Trump the Most

A recent poll showed that comedians and comedy writers love Trump because, "He makes our jobs easy!"

written by Al N., 03 December 2017
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Matt Lauer Wins Yet Another Award

Fired NBC anchor Lauer has been recognized by the Natl Press Predators' Alliance as the 2017's Most Egregious Sexual Scumbag Hypocrite. Surprisingly. Charlie Rose was second-ran in the voting.

written by Trinculoman, 02 December 2017
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Activist's hair sets off geiger counter

After random citizens reported feeling sickened around a social justice warrior of unknown gender, health authorities decided to scan the activist. They found high radiation levels in zer green hair.

written by Purple Girl, 02 December 2017
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Rioters still defacing monuments

Rioters are demanding that all offensive monuments be removed in DC. They're calling Lady Liberty a green supremacist symbol, and calling the Washington Monument a white supremacist phallic symbol.

written by Purple Girl, 01 December 2017
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He-Man Woman Haters Club Inducts New Members Matt Lauer and Kevin Spacey

The club also started a rural division, which Garrison Keillor will be in charge of.

written by Al N., 01 December 2017
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Trump Insults Morning Joe, Shames Matt Lauer, and Makes Fun of Asian Leaders All in One Hour

A President's work is never done.

written by Al N., 01 December 2017
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Royal Corgis Don't Like Meghan Markle-Wedding Called Off

"I'm sorry I can't go against the Queen and Corgis but she can evict me so there you go" said Harry.

written by Al N., 28 November 2017
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Beyonce Wins Time Magazine's Person of the Year in Clear Dis to Trump

A spokesman said "We are so sick of Trump we also considered Sean Spicer, Joe Weiner & Carrot-Top."

written by Al N., 25 November 2017
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Beyonce Wins Time Magazine's Person of the Year in Clear Dis to Trump

A spokesman said "We are so sick of Trump we also considered Sean Spicer, Joe Weiner & Carrot-Top."

written by Al N., 25 November 2017
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Exclusive Washington DC Club Reveals Two Prime Candidates for Its Highest Honor

Nation's Capital Gluteus Maximizers Club recently announced two of their most famous members--Senator Al Franken & President H W Bush--are in keen competition for the 2018 Grabasser of the Year award.

written by Trinculoman, 24 November 2017
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Congressman Conyers's Predatory Sexual Harassing Misunderstood

Former female staffer of Conyers reports being called into his DC office only to find him wearing only boxers. But she didn't know he was only practicing to be Chief Underpants Officer of the House.

written by Trinculoman, 23 November 2017
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Charlie Rose Plans a Redemptive Thanksgiving Weekend

Fired sexual predator Rose has time now to reflect on his heinous deeds. So, Charlie has invited all the former interns he harassed/molested to his Long Island estate for a Holiday Expose-all-Fest.

written by Trinculoman, 22 November 2017
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LA Mayor & City Council Tout New Tourist Attraction

City of Angels has one more attraction to draw tourists downtown--Shit on the Streets. The ever increasing LA homeless are doing their best to make tourists welcome by defecating wherever they please.

written by Trinculoman, 22 November 2017
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Fox News on the Cutting Edge of Smell-O-Vision

Fox scores smell-through in odorous airing of proto-Old Fart Bill Bennett.Gasser Bill exudes lethal bombs,as he lamely effuses on current events, plugging his prior tome: A Book of My Virtuous Farts.

written by Trinculoman, 21 November 2017
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Despite Celebrating Crowds, Mugabe of Zimbabwe Won't Recognize Coup

The 93-year old thinks it's his birthday again and thanks all the demonstrators.

written by Al N., 20 November 2017
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Trump Denies Relationship With Putin

"If I liked men, and I don't, Putin would be too unattractive for me. I am only attracted to beauty.

written by Al N., 18 November 2017
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Trump is So Mad at North Korea That He Signs Executive Order Closing ALL Korean Restaurants and Grocery Stores

Ghettos mourn loss of only local food sources while pissed-off South Koreans protest at Trump Tower.

written by Al N., 18 November 2017
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Trump Tweets He Suspects That Hillary is Aiding the North Koreans

"Crooked Hillary has been seen exiting Korean restaurants. This MUST be looked into. Sad!" he said.

written by Al N., 16 November 2017
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107-Year Old Woman Says She Was Sexually Harassed By Sigmund Freud

"Everything out of the man's mouth was about sex, sex, and more sex. A total pervert!" she said.

written by Al N., 16 November 2017
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"The Spoof" is now paying writers to claim that "The Spoof" is now paying writers

In a press release Tuesday, the CEO stated that "the best part is nobody actually gets paid." Several writers, including this one, have expressed annoyance upon realizing that it was all a spoof.

written by Carl Magnussen, 16 November 2017
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Trump Reveals That Putin Said He Didn't Fix Presidential Election, Cross His Heart and Hope to Die

"I'm sure he's serious because Mr. Putin also said, "Stick a needle in my eye," said Trump.

written by Al N., 14 November 2017
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Alabama Republican Roy Moore

Would you believe your 14-year-old daughter if she said a 32-year-old man had touched her inappropriately? Or would you call your daughter a liar?

written by K.C. Bell, 11 November 2017
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Poll Reveals That Most People World-wide Want Trump to Be the First Man on Mars

Some people suggested that since he's so orange, that maybe he should be the first man on the sun.

written by Al N., 07 November 2017
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Trump Again Flees Country as Russian Investigation Heats Up

The tour will concentrate on countries that don't have extradition agreements with the U.S.

written by Al N., 03 November 2017
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Potential Louis Vuitton handbags saved by Indian Rubber Man!

An Indian Rubber Man saved the skin of a 12ft croc before croc poachers could skin the thing alive! Louis Vuitton has now gone vegan!

written by Jaggedone, 02 November 2017
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Trump Goes to Hit the Button, But Can't Get it To Work

Luckily for the world, his little, tiny fingers don't have enough strength to push the button!

written by Al N., 01 November 2017
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Berserk AI program in spasmodic thrashing

.. keeps selecting Aspartame Boy as the Featured Writer.

written by Aspartame Boy, 30 October 2017
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Canadian Rock Icon Dies, New Orleans Sinks

his band denies having anything to do with this catastrophe. When asked to comment, mayor Mitch Landrieu could only say: "Blub gurgle burble glub blub!"

written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw, 30 October 2017
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Twitter Tech People Devise a Custom Twitter Feed to Their Best Customer, Donald Trump

The keyboard of the Twitter device has a very tiny keyboard and can accomadate very small hands.

written by Al N., 30 October 2017
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Previously Unknown Angle on Clinton Funding of Fusion GPS Now Revealed

Clinton campaign paid not only to tell lies about Trump in Russia, but also paid Agent Steele to pimp for Bubba in Moscow after $500K speech. Real narrative is about Bubba shagging Russki whores.

written by Trinculoman, 29 October 2017
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Scientists say Universe shoudn't exist

The Universe responds: Scientists shouldn't exist.

written by Aspartame Boy, 27 October 2017
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Trump Tweets That Gary Busey Will Be the New Secretary of State

"My administration is in a ratings slump, and Busey has generated good ratings for me in the past"

written by Al N., 26 October 2017
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White Supremacists and KKK Deny Support of Trump

"Even us racists are too embarrassed of him to give him our support" said a guy dressed like Hitler.

written by Al N., 22 October 2017
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Trump Will Stop Calling Gold Star Parents and Will Just Tweet Them Instead

The message will be the same: "He knew what he was signing" & "Sorry he was an unsuccesful soldier."

written by Al N., 20 October 2017
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Harvey Weinstein ejaculated from Motion Picture Academy

In an emergency meeting of the Motion Pictue Academy, reviewing the sexual antics of Weinstein until, in a crescendo of passion, they ejaculated him all the way to New Jersey, land of the creeps.

written by Aspartame Boy, 15 October 2017
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Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby, and Bill O'Reilly to Form Club

It'll be a branch of the He-Man Woman Haters Club.

written by Al N., 13 October 2017
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Republicans Admit They Plan to Just Start Ignoring Trump and Let Pence Take Over as President

As long as Trump is allowed to watch TV, tweet, and golf he won't know the difference.

written by Al N., 11 October 2017
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Vice-President Pence Leaves Colts vs. 49ers Game During Protests

He thought they were bowing to him, and when he found out they weren't, he got embarrassed and left.

written by Al N., 10 October 2017
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Strictly come dancing with the dead!

Madagascans do it, so why shouldn't the rest of the world! Fred Astaire would be tap dancing in his grave!

written by Jaggedone, 09 October 2017
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"You're fired!"

I hear the Republican Party appeared on a recent episode of The Apprentice as one of its guests and was promptly fired by its addled host.

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 07 October 2017
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U.S. Secretary of State Rex Tillerson Denies Calling Trump a "Moron"

"What I actually said was that he was a FUCKING moron!" said Tillerson.

written by Al N., 07 October 2017
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When Dreaming is not Dreaming or when it Is?

After falling asleep watching TV, a man woke up to find out he was dreaming that he had awoken from watching the news. There was nothing memorable about the news. He may have slept through it--or not.

written by D. L. Hawkinson, 06 October 2017
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Trump Will Have Every Puerto Rican's Paychecks Garnished Until Hurricane Maria Damage is Paid Off

...Even though the Federal Government hasn't actually done anything yet...

written by Al N., 06 October 2017
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