Showing the very latest breaking spoof news snippets. You can use the calendar on the right to browse through the most recent breaking news snippets.

Man Cures Cancer While Sitting In ER Waiting Room

After arriving at the hospital for a health complication a gentleman had to wait to be seen. 8 years later he's still there, but found the cure for cancer in the meantime. That was 6 years ago...

written by Xavier Fairbanks, 23 February 2018

US Flag still in psychiatric care following Fergie "Performance"

Following Fergie's "performance" of the National Anthem, the US Flag hanging in the arena suffered major mental turmoil. The flag remains under full time psychiatric care for severe PTSD.

written by Xavier Fairbanks, 23 February 2018

Decoding and Translation of Last Dead Sea Scroll Completed

Message Revealed: Let's Go Mets!

written by Gail Farrelly, 22 February 2018

10 kg suitcases filled with children are forbidden!!

Cheap Brit/Irish airlines are warning their customers that 10 kg suitcases stuffed with illegal children are forbidden and if one does slip on board they will not be given free food or drink, no way!

written by Jaggedone, 21 February 2018

New Bill Would Give Guns Citizenship

Sen. Ted Cruz (TX-R) introduced a bill {BLAKA} that would give guns US citizenship, along with the right to vote and own weapons. Asked about how they felt about this bill a gun said "bang bang click"

written by Alexander Pence, 20 February 2018

When does a US chicken do a runner in the UK?

Answer; when its brain is pumped full with chemicals and starts to think before going to be mass slaughtered! No headless EU chickens for the UK nugget market, only chemically infused ones!

written by Jaggedone, 20 February 2018

United States Stupidity Quotient

The S. Q. increased 16% in the first year of Trump's term of office. It now stands at 69%.

written by The Ruling Authority, 19 February 2018

Hunters Attempt to Take Back NRA

Unfortunately out-gunned by militias and gun lobbyists.

written by The Ruling Authority, 18 February 2018

Trump Farts, Blames It On Obama

At 9:21am Eastern Standard Time this morning President Donald Trump laid a horrendous egg fart while shaking the hand of German leader Andrea Merkel. He quickly cited Obamacare as the likely cause.

written by ScottTalbotEvans, 18 February 2018

Philadelphia Eagles Only Need 2-Passenger Corvette For Official White House Visit After Winning Super Bowl Team

The delegation was the team coach who lost the coin toss and the team driver. The rest boycotted.

written by Al N., 17 February 2018

Pink Floyd Announce They Will Rename Their LP "The Wall" In Honor of Trump

"Because he talks about the Wall so much we have decided to call the album "The Dunce."

written by Al N., 17 February 2018

No, anyone but Boris

Boris Johnson is now in the running to play James Bond.....

written by Ben Macnair, 16 February 2018

Trumped

Donald Trump's twitter feed has been quiet for a while now. It must be cooking up some new ideas.

written by Ben Macnair, 16 February 2018

Super Bowl Winners Eagles Do Victory Tour

Clueless fans keep yelling for them to play "Hotel California."

written by Al N., 15 February 2018

Eric, Donald Trump, Jr. and Jarrad Kushner Offered Big Hollywood Movie Roles

They are casting to redo the "Three Stooges."

written by Al N., 15 February 2018

Eric and Donald Trump Jr. Are Kidnapped and Returned by the Russians

At first, no one realizes they're missing. When they are returned they both have new tooth fillings.

written by Al N., 15 February 2018

Vice-President Pence Reveals He Has a Fear of Orientals

Pres. Trump sent him to the Winter Olympics to help him overcome his fears but only made it worse.

written by Al N., 12 February 2018

TV Surprise

There was a massive surprise on British Television today as the televisual comedian was only on terrestrial channels for 90 minutes.

written by Ben Macnair, 09 February 2018

Name Change

Following the break-down of several negotiations, Teresa May has changed her name to Teresa Not on your Nelly.

written by Ben Macnair, 09 February 2018

Scientists Seek Artificial Filter for Trump's Thoughts

"As is, he has no filter and just blurts and tweets whatever pops into his head," said a scientist.

written by Al N., 07 February 2018

Sarah Will Be Allowed to Attend Prince Harry's Wedding in Disguise

Prince Philip will also have 6 men assigned to him to distract him whenever Fergie is in view.

written by Al N., 07 February 2018

Trump is Banned From Attending Olympics

It is the first thing both North and South Korea have agreed on in a long time.

written by Al N., 07 February 2018

Trump Calls the Stock Market Drop "Fake News" and Blames Obama and Crooked Hillary

He recommends that investors buy Trump Vodka and that then, things will be better!

written by Al N., 07 February 2018

Rep Schiff Exposed as Hillary Black Ops Bot

RoboFeed blog explains Calif Rep Adam Schiff is just an animated Bot-a product of the Hillary Black Ops skunkworks, designed to continuously spew lies based on a genomic coding of Clinton's instincts.

written by Trinculoman, 06 February 2018

Secret FBI Memo Reveals Pelosi as Zombie

FBI internal memo, squashed by Comey, reveals that Minority Leader is a zombie. Pelosi has been eating the homeless population of DC for years, thus elevating the Capital status for reducing beggars.

written by Trinculoman, 04 February 2018

Trump Gives Cast of Fox & Friends the Presidential Medal of Freedom

He wanted to knight them but much to his chagrin, was informed he didn't have the power to do that.

written by Al N., 04 February 2018

Comey Preps for Next Career Move, Buys J. Edgar's Dress

Ex-FBI Flack Comey spewed big bucks at a SoHo auction to nab former FBI-chiefiette Hoover's lounging smock. Comey will hit the Euro-Trash Drag Queen circuit as "Floobie"- DC's Trannie of Fake Justice.

written by Trinculoman, 03 February 2018

North Korea Wanted to Start Destroying U.S. By Getting Trump

It was before they realized that by leaving Trump where he is, will destroy the U.S. a lot faster.

written by Al N., 03 February 2018

Sean Hannity and Tucker Carlson to Form Singing Duo

Their first set list includes Lyin' Eyes, Liar, Lies, Lie to Me, & Fox on the Run.

written by Al N., 01 February 2018

MSU Sports Coach Larry Nassar Sentenced to Additional 20-40 Years On Top of 40 to 175 Years Sentence

Officials are arguing over which of the sentences the 54-year old will start serving first.

written by Al N., 01 February 2018

Trump to Start New Religion

He has also declared himself the first saint of his new religion.

written by Al N., 31 January 2018

@FBI arrests itself

In a bizarre action today, @FBI agents everywhere handcuffed themselves to each other in a move to avoid felony take-downs.

written by Aspartame Boy, 30 January 2018

Donald Trump Admits He Keeps His Family Around to Make Him Look Smart

"Let's face it, the 3 Stooges would look like geniuses if compared to Ivanka, Donny, and Eric!"

written by Al N., 26 January 2018

After a Year of Trump, Immigrants are Asking to Be Deported

One of them mentioned that "North Korea is looking better all the time..."

written by Al N., 25 January 2018

Time is money?

If, as my Grandpa used to say, "Time is money," why is it that I'm now sixty and not a whole wealthier than when I was forty?

written by Matt Birkenhauer, 24 January 2018

Trump Imposes Tariffs on Rotary Dial Phones and Kerosene Lamps

"I hope the liberals can see that I'm keeping my promise on guarding American industry" said Trump.

written by Al N., 23 January 2018

Big Brother to be Axed

Big Brother is set to be axed from Channel 5, due to a shortage of non-entities to appear on it.

written by Ben Macnair, 21 January 2018

"Goop" Introduces Coal Egg

"Once you muster enough pelvic muscle strength to compress this baby into a diamond, you will have a beautiful gemstone to present to the man of your dreams," declared spokesmodel Gwyneth Paltrow.

written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw, 13 January 2018

Trump Tweets to be Appended to "Little Red Book"

Maoist scholars have been compiling all of His Orangeness's tweets, and, after careful deliberation, have deemed them to be just as insightful as the sayings of The Great Helmsman.

written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw, 13 January 2018

Trump is Denied Permission to Send 'Fire and Fury' Author Richard Wolff to Guantanamo

Trump was given permission to send Bannon, Ivanka, Don, Jr., Eric, or Jarrod there if he wanted.

written by Al N., 11 January 2018

Trump Tweets Again and Again How Sane He Is and How He is a Genius

His latest tweet: "I am sane and a genius and lx-e.3zl ls.a'oor.ls; BigMac ..2k9dlskwoncjwkllq..0...

written by Al N., 10 January 2018

Social justice warrior can't change her hair color

Ever since Mandy Hater became a social justice warrior, her hair color has naturally become green, and hair dye no longer works. She'd pull it out in frustration, but it will only grow into a mohawk.

written by Purple Girl, 25 December 2017

Eric and Donnie Trump, Jr. Caught in Plot to Kidnap Santa Claus and Corner the Market on Toys

They both claim a Russian guy said it would be good for the country and planned the whole thing out.

written by Al N., 21 December 2017

One of Hitler's Parade Limos Becomes Available--Trump Jumps On It

"Oh, no reason" Trump replied when asked why he purchased the infamous 1939 Mercedes.

written by Al N., 21 December 2017

FBI Agent Taken off Trump Probe Due to "Extreme Bias"

The agent had the nerve to say he thought Eric Trump looked a little "funny."

written by Al N., 20 December 2017

Dead Man Walking

A woman greeted a neighbor, covered in dirt. "You must be working hard in your garden," she said. She later read his obituary. He'd been dead for 5 days. She wondered if she could still buy flowers.

written by D. L. Hawkinson, 19 December 2017

Trump is Trying to Bring Osama Bin Laden Back to Life

He has vowed to undo EVERYTHING Obama ever did.

written by Al N., 18 December 2017

The NBA's Decision to Allow Space Aliens to Play Met with Opposition

An anonymous basketball player who refuses to speak on camera is allegedly saying, "I don't see why these slimy, 2-headed creatures are allowed to play. It's a wonder they let us black athletes play."

written by Purple Girl, 16 December 2017

Study Finds Eggs are Good For You Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.

Putting the debate to rest once and for all, researchers concluded that eggs are good for you Mondays,Wednesdays,and Fridays,and bad for you Tuesdays, Thursday,and alternate Saturdays.

written by ScottTalbotEvans, 14 December 2017

President Trump Found Dead In Apparent Auto-Erotic Asphyxiation!

Visitors to the Oval Office were stunned today to stumble upon the corpse of #45 lying face down on his desk with the plastic bag from Wonder Bread over his head,and child porn on his laptop.

written by ScottTalbotEvans, 14 December 2017
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