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Rating:

New Olympic Medal to Be Awarded

Over 5,000 soldiers who complete a tour of the Olympic Games in London are to be awarded a new campaign medalcalled the Charing Cross according to a Ministry of Defence spokesman.

written by IN SEINE, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Drunken German Football Fans Celebrate Woman Parking Her Car

Well they haven't had much else to celebrate lately...

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Obama's old N.Y.C. Apartment Available for $2,400 a month

Mitt Romney is thinking of renting it as storage for his spare change...

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
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20% of people watching sport this summer 'will do so online'

It's a lot easier to abuse the players and referees when their registered on social networks.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

50 Cent: I want to work with Frank Ocean

I want to play 50 shades of grey style but the missus has put the kibosh on it...

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Katie Holmes, Suri in New York car crash

You might say Scientology work in mysterious ways' i couldn't possibly comment.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Man With Bizarre Anatomy Has Run-In With TSA

Turned out he had a new book '50 Shades of Grey's Anatomy' down his pants.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

'Finding Nemo 2' going ahead with original's director

Sounds a bit two fishy to me.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Obama Booed For Not Kissing First Lady At Basketball Game

Just as well they weren't at a golf tournament, Tiger Woods might have stepped in for a pucker-up.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Cat Celebrates 15 Years As Mayor Of Alaskan Town

Well anyone's better than Boris Johnson.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Madonna makes $75 million from MDNA tour

Perhaps now she can afford some new reinforced bra's that don't keep falling off when she's on stage.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Man Steals School Bus, Goes On Wild Ride

Well at least he won't have to worry about the bus drivers going on strike during the Olympics.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

New viral sensation hits the internet

Balancing Things On Your Partner's Head While They're Asleep...I wish I'd seen this last week, I bought some new shelves at the weekend.

written by radiogagger, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Recession begins to hit murderers

The UK's murder rate is at its lowest for 30 years.

Murderers blame the recession. "I can't afford fuel for my van any more, so I've had to cut down on the murdering," said one poor killer.

written by CaptainSausage, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Romney: That's Why I Do Private Screenings

A man killed 12 moviegoers beore the new Batman. Romney said he was "shocked." He had not been in a theater in years except for when he bought a few, fired everyone & left. It was his favorite comedy.

written by Matt Morchower, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Justice

The Police are looking for a killer who escaped justice

written by j.w., 20 July 2012
Rating:

Flame-grilled Beefeater

A Beefeater was slightly burnt as the Olympic flame came to the Tower of London today. The torch bearer tripped in the courtyard,the Yeoman of the Guard caught the torch slightly singeing his tunic.

written by IN SEINE, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Man Utd bid for RIP!

Man Utd have put a bid in for Arsenal's RIP (?) Oops sorry RVP and if they sell him then they can RIP!

written by Jaggedone, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Alhambra employee tells Dutch tourist to "fuck off"!

An unpleasant incident occurred at the world famous tourist attraction, the Alhambra, in Granada. A Dutch tourist was told to "fuck off" because she didn't have a barcode; Olé, et viva la Espana!

written by Jaggedone, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Inseine's BOOK OF THE DAY 103

"Play Like Benny Goodman"

by

Clara Nett.

written by IN SEINE, 20 July 2012
Rating:

'Hero' Catches Girl After Three-Storey Fall

Amazing!

Caught on video

written by Inchcock, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Studies Show 80% of People Watch Sports On-Line This Summer

80% of people watching sports this summer will do so on-line. 100% of those people will do so after watching on-line porn.

written by Ellie James, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Man With Bizarre Anatomy has Run-In with TSA

Man with bizarre anatomy has run-in with TSA. TSA was shocked to discover it really was just a banana in his pocket.

written by Ellie James, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Really in Bed with You Now

Americans feel the Obama administration is interfering with their lives. Now OSHA is to assign a counselor to all newly married (Gay and Straight) couples to make sure they don't hurt themselves!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

The Dreaded Filibuster

Senate Majority Leader Reid (D-NV) is quietly preparing his Democratic caucus for filibusters, when the Republicans take over the Senate in 2013!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

A Speech

LONE RANGER: Did you hear the NY Senior Senator's speech the other night about the Disclose Act? TONTO: Yes he disclosed he is a whiner!


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Obama Campaign Needs Money

Pres. Obama has demonized Wall Street & wants to raise taxes on small businesses, which have stopped contributing. DNC Chair Shultz is organizing a Democratic bake sale, with Michelle baking cookies!




written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Political Hypocrites

Rep. Pelosi (D-CA) and Sen. Majority Leader Reid (D-NV) have refused to release their tax records, yet they call for Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney to release his tax returns!


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Shocking, Shocking, Shocking

Hollywood has produced a documentary about the president's surprise attack on Capitalism called Obama, Obama, Obama (subtitled socialist, socialist, socialist)!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Management Style

The American Registry of Clueless Empty Suits (ARCES) has inducted President Obama. The organization consists of executives that look good in a suit, wave their arms and espouse meaningless hokum!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Got No Stamps

USPS expects to default Aug. 1, 2012 on its annual payment for future retiree health benefits. Please place your post person in a FedEx box and ship to Capitol Hill Washington DC on this date!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Obama's Anti-Business Posture

President Obama while growing up in Hawaii started a snow shoveling and hot lemonade business that went into bankruptcy!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

White House Inundated

Pres. Obama opined in a fund raising letter "when I decided to run for president, I had significantly fewer gray hairs than I do today." The WH received 200 million bottles of Hair Color for Men!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Democratic Election Year Distraction

San Francisco uses Chinese steel to retrofit the Oakland Bay Bridge, no outrage by Rep. Pelosi (D-SF). But, Senate Majority Leader Reid (D-NV) has a hissy-fit over US Olympic uniforms made in China!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Bumper Sticker

New very simple campaign 2012 bumper sticker "EVERYTHING OBAMA TOUCHES TURNS TO S**T!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
Rating:

Poop Tax

Rabid environmentalists are demanding that the EPA require an environmental impact statement be filed every time a potty is used or the individual will be subjected to a poop tax!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 July 2012
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