Cleaning vagrants
Argos have moved their vagrant cleaning products to the appropriate catalogue section after it was pointed out that sporting goods is the wrong place for trampoline.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
written by
IainB, 30 January 2012
Nicotine patches may be addictive.
Nicotine patches may be addictive according to Doctors in the Uk with many paitents being prescribed cigarettes to help them deal with there craving.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
London Tube staff reject £500 Olympics bonus deal
"Look - we want £1,000, tickets for the 100 metres final and the womens beach volleyball - non negotiable!"
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Child sent to school with a Smartie sandwich
That's disgusting! Even Katie Price sends her child with a much more substantial snickers sandwich.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
'Only Fools And Horse' to be remade in America
"This time next year Rodney we'll be dollar millionaires".
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Home secretary approves police pay deal
Not as if it's her own money is it?
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Facebook: rise in use causes concern
Facebook the popular on line bullying tool has revealed that 70% of users are merely reporting on the minutiae of everyday life and not driving school friends to suicide or stalking ex partners.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
written by
D Agnew, 30 January 2012
Portsmouth players are handed begging bowls instead of wages!
Pompey players were seen begging in town after their club refused to pay them their wages. The Chairman cancelled training and told the players, "begging is not a sin, not paying our taxes is!".
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
libya over taken by Wales as worst holiday
Popular holiday magazine "popular holidays" has named Wales as the worst place to stay. Knocking Libya off the top spot. Beirut is still at #3 followed closely by North Korea.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
written by
D Agnew, 30 January 2012
Centre parcs to allow more poor people
posh holiday firm centre parcs has agreed to allow plebeians inside its forests parks. The new Pine-Gulag section should be open by March 2013.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
written by
D Agnew, 30 January 2012
Earthquake watch
Haiti found to be nicer to look at afterearthquake say a team of homo sexual interior decorators.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
written by
D Agnew, 30 January 2012
Joey Barton's uncle is a "Homo-Sapien"
Joey Barton has come out and admitted his uncle is a "Homo-Sapien" (the gay type). Joey is not one, a homo-sapien that is, he prefers to act like a primate, only difference is they have brains!
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Olympic Misery
Transport Bosses have admitted that the Olympics will cause travel misery across London-and are urging commuters to 'go down the pub' to avoid lengthy delays..most were driven to drink years ago!
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Fraudsters in the UK
'Extraordinary Year' for fraudsters in the UK....my, my those Parliamentarians have been busy boys and girls!
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
First Sun journalists arrested in corruption investigation
Ouch! That must put a dent in the plans to launch a 'Sunday Sun' (to replace the News Of The World)
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Facebook close to $100m float
With $100m they could probably buy the Costa Concordia. Not sure if it will float though.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Users boycott twitter over censor plans
Hello to all you new spoof readers out there
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
RBS chief Stephen Hester waives bonus of nearly £1m
waves it goodbye! (Hoorah!)
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Bob Geldof speaks about daughters pregnancy
"Do ya think Africa will raise some money for me this time?"
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Katie Price wins debate at Cambridge University
Ok. stop the world i want to get off...
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
MF Global money 'Vaporized'
Perhaps it was a David Blaine stunt?
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Cameron to quit
British PM, David Cameron, will resign from office at noon tomorrow. He says that he'd rather play cricket than put up with all those terrible constituents otherwise known as voters. More later today.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
C4 axe Frankie Boyle's comedy show Tramadol Nights after just one series
Back to the BBC for the mild mannered Boyle then?
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Pay as you mow.
Electrical giant Bosh yesterday revealled that there top of the range lawnmowers would be available on a pay as you go bases. Top ups can then be purchased depending on the size of your lawn.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Man injured in botched suicide attempt.
A man from Bristol was left with serious head injuries after trying to hang himself with his braces but ended up fracturing his skull as the braces were elastic and propelled him into the cealing.
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
Audley Harrison is planning a surprise return to boxing!
The heavyweight Strictly Come Dancing star will fight Ali Adams at the Brentwood Centre on April 14 2012.
"Well he's got nerve, give him that much!"
Thank you for your rating.
You have already rated this, thanks!
