Order by:
Rating:

Chelsea to face Bayern Munich in Champions League Final

This is the final our wonderful tabloid papers were hoping for. Now they can wheel out a load of tired old England/Germany war cliches.

The Battle of Bavaria.

They can have that one for free.

written by Simon Saunders, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Fourth case of "Mad Cow" disease discovered in California

The US Department of Agriculture has confirmed the diagnosis but has strenuously denied rumours that Californian Representative Nancy Pelosi is infected with the disease.

Poor old Nancy.

written by Simon Saunders, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Southern England Philosophical About Hosepipe Ban

'It doesn't matter to me, anymore,' said a typical resident of southern England. 'My hosepipe just got swept away in the floods.'

written by Swan Morrison, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Torres proves everybody wrong!

Fernando Torres has proven his critics wrong and after being told by Di Matteo what a goal actually is; 2 posts, a cross-bar and a net, he saw the light and Abramovich is now £50 million better off!

written by Jaggedone, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Russell Brand - What A

Twat!

written by Blazing Saddle, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Rupert Murdoch: Dealing with Blair 'like porcupines mating'

Yep, lots of pricks, nasty business

written by queen mudder, 25 April 2012
Rating:

25 April 2012: UK Back in Recession!

"Were we ever out of the recession?"

written by Inchcock, 25 April 2012
Rating:

LSD 'helps alcoholics to give up drinking!'

LSD is a class A drug in the UK and is one of the most powerful hallucinogens... but what do I know?

written by Inchcock, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Drag Car Explodes Around Him at 260 mph!

However, it is not relief at being alive, but anger at his failure to complete the qualifying heat that engulfs Hagan as he climbs from the still-smouldering shell of the car - 'Unharmed!'

"Flippin' 'eck!"

written by Inchcock, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Mario Balotelli's mum lives on the Shameless council estate!

The £170,000-a-week footballer lives in a mansion and plush hotel, Rose Barwuah pays £550-a-month for a terrace house in Manchester, famous in TV's Shameless.

"But she did give him away as a child!"

written by Inchcock, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Mad cow disease found in California

aka another Mitt Romney supporter.

written by radiogagger, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Leveson Latest: Murodch says Brown was 'unbalanced'

That was probably the whiskey.

written by radiogagger, 25 April 2012
Rating:

UK slides into double dip recession.

Only marginally more healthy than a sherbert dip.

written by radiogagger, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Barcelona 2 Chelsea 2 - Chelsea win 3-2 on aggregate.

Chelsea become the first team to qualify for the Champions League final without touching the ball during a 90 minute match.

written by radiogagger, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Robin Van Persie named PFA player of the year

Ashley Young named PFA diver of the year.

written by radiogagger, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Murdoch appear at Leveson inquiry

News Corp chief executive Rupert Murdoch will give evidence to the Leveson Inquiry over two days this week.

Custard pies at the ready guys.

written by radiogagger, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Actor dies after accidentally hanging himself while playing Judas

Method actor?

Story here

written by radiogagger, 25 April 2012
Rating:

You've never had it so good!

Britain slips back into recession......What gave it away the Unemployment, INCREASING food banks , profit making charity shops or total lack of consumer spending power due to poverty stricken wages?

written by Herrdoktorfox, 25 April 2012
Rating:

The Return of Michael Jackson Expected Imminently

Michael Jackson will be appearing on stage at a theatre near you... as a hologram. This is nothing new as a hologram of Elvis Presley has been working in a chip shop in Cardiff for years!

written by IN SEINE, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Inseine's BOOK OF THE DAY 31

"The Wash and Wear Revolution"

by

Paul E. Ester

written by IN SEINE, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Lightning contains enough energy to boil eight million cups of tea!

"I wish someone would test out the theory on Cameron!"

written by Inchcock, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Barack Obama knows sign language!

"I bet some have been with one or two fingers?"

written by Inchcock, 25 April 2012
Rating:

Three Brits Charged With Stealing Aussie Penguin

Charged with trespassing, stealing and unlawfully keeping a protected animal, the trio, released a video of their drunken antics to prove they mean no harm to the animal.

"Pick up up a Penguin?"

written by Inchcock, 25 April 2012
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